I have recently learned I have DID. Can anyone give advice?

As the title says I realized my DID recently. No one has ever spoke of me 'not being there' and I have not come back in the middle of a conversation.
I used to have 2 alters Musei and Nekome who surfaced very close to the same time about a 3 weeks ago. (I believe) They have since integrated themselves as I no longer am able to speak with them. A new alter, Nichol, he prefers to be called Cole, surfaced 3 days ago. He literally woke up during the night, as 'I' slept, from a nightmare he experienced (this is also the first time I am sure I wasn't in control), he later spoke to me after school that day.
I have spoken of my DID to only one other person, my best friend at school, as I hold him in higher trust than any other person and he is trustworthy to keep a secret. I don't feel as though I can trust my school counselor. And I would like to avoid a therapist as long as safely possible.
I don't think they would take us seriously and searching for a experienced therapist would take a long time and would likely be expensive.
-Cole
Normally Cole is unable to speak aloud around people.
I don't feel safe attracting attention to myself (ourself?).
-Cole
Can anyone give us advice on how to get on co-operatively without a therapist?
I probably wouldn't speak to him anyway...
-Cole
Also most of the time we are co-conscious unless we are both asleep or Cole is.
Hey! Don't 'watch' me sleep! Or hear? Whatever...
-Cole

Its not wise to avoid a therapist. To get along with the therapist you should be honest, open and cooperative. Its that simple. And turn up for appointments of course.

For a person who is going through a similar time as you, i think that if you don't want to go see a therapist you should try talking to Cole more often. Try to figure out what the problem is, talk it out and try to make him feel better in turn, making him more friendly and co-operative? I'm not sure if I have DID yet, but i do have some sort of other voices in my head, or rather other people. :/ what I do is i sit down and talk to them for a while, as you'd do talking to a best-friend. Trying to make them feel better about a problem, council them a bit. Then when they're happy, try to get along? I'm not sure how to explain how i do it but it keeps everyone under control. o3o i talk to myself often throughout the day, aloud if no one is around, trying to keep everyone happy and co-operating. this usually settles them down. i hope it helped. >.<

picklecat13 wrote:For a person who is going through a similar time as you, i think that if you don't want to go see a therapist you should try talking to Cole more often. Try to figure out what the problem is, talk it out and try to make him feel better in turn, making him more friendly and co-operative? I'm not sure if I have DID yet, but i do have some sort of other voices in my head, or rather other people. :/ what I do is i sit down and talk to them for a while, as you'd do talking to a best-friend. Trying to make them feel better about a problem, council them a bit. Then when they're happy, try to get along? I'm not sure how to explain how i do it but it keeps everyone under control. o3o i talk to myself often throughout the day, aloud if no one is around, trying to keep everyone happy and co-operating. this usually settles them down. i hope it helped. >.<

Great advice, in my opinion.
I've only been made aware of my DID very recently also, alters started appearing in therapy a few months back, but it wasn't until I got a DX that I could really accept and deal. But hey, that's just me.

I also agree with seeing a therapist, someone who specialises in DID or at least dissociation, obviously a lot of the work has to be done by you (and you...) but seeing a therapist, someone outside of your system, who understands DID can really help when things get very difficult. My therapist is and has been a huge help.

Good luck with your journey.

Blu.

Blu-Web wrote:I also agree with seeing a therapist, someone who specialises in DID or at least dissociation, obviously a lot of the work has to be done by you (and you...) but seeing a therapist, someone outside of your system, who understands DID can really help when things get very difficult. My therapist is and has been a huge help.

Good luck with your journey.

Blu.

Blu, I understand why I would need a therapist but I haven't gone through a very difficult phase while being aware of my DID. If it ever gets to that point when I can't get a new alter co-operative or calm(not sure which is better yet, most of the time for me it comes together) I will be contacting a therapist. Thank you for the well wishes

picklecat13 wrote:For a person who is going through a similar time as you, i think that if you don't want to go see a therapist you should try talking to Cole more often. Try to figure out what the problem is, talk it out and try to make him feel better in turn, making him more friendly and co-operative? I'm not sure if I have DID yet, but i do have some sort of other voices in my head, or rather other people. :/ what I do is i sit down and talk to them for a while, as you'd do talking to a best-friend. Trying to make them feel better about a problem, council them a bit. Then when they're happy, try to get along? I'm not sure how to explain how i do it but it keeps everyone under control. o3o i talk to myself often throughout the day, aloud if no one is around, trying to keep everyone happy and co-operating. this usually settles them down. i hope it helped. >.<

I have actually been working on doing exactly this I understand what you mean by this. Good luck with working with your alters
Thank you both for the advice. Hopefully myself and my host (He doesn't want to give his real first name right now) can work through any of our problems.
-Cole

I have only very recently realised this too. It's helping me a lot to read through other people's posts here and the resources. I feel quite relieved to find out more about what's going on because I've been very confused, but now lots of things are starting to make sense, and it's great to find there are other people out there who feel the same. It's helping me too to have an open mind and be open to my alters. I'm glad you can talk to Cole and hope you can both work through things.

Rubyscarlet wrote:I have only very recently realised this too. It's helping me a lot to read through other people's posts here and the resources. I feel quite relieved to find out more about what's going on because I've been very confused, but now lots of things are starting to make sense, and it's great to find there are other people out there who feel the same. It's helping me too to have an open mind and be open to my alters. I'm glad you can talk to Cole and hope you can both work through things.

That is good to hear that your reading has been helping you. My time on this forum (before making an account) helped me with working with Cole and getting him to open up to me.

On an unrelated note... I have been waking up in the night with night terrors and I am left alone in the night, my brother(host) still sleeping, and I am in control of the body entirely without guidance. It frightens me and worries my brother. Can anyone help us with this?
-Cole

Cole, I pray when I wake up with night terrors. I'm not religious - spiritual - but it helps me to pray for safety, take deep breaths, and also looking around to check I'm still in my own room and reminding myself that I'm safe and there is no one here to hurt me

Rubyscarlet wrote:Cole, I pray when I wake up with night terrors. I'm not religious - spiritual - but it helps me to pray for safety, take deep breaths, and also looking around to check I'm still in my own room and reminding myself that I'm safe and there is no one here to hurt me

I will try that Ruby thank you for the advice! It is more frightening that my brother doesn't wake up with me than the terror itself.
-Cole
Also thank you all for helping us with our problems when I am sure you have your own
Well wishes to all of you.

Remember your brother is there too even if he is asleep, Cole, and you are both safe. Glad to be of help
Well wishes to both of you too!