How are you today thread (trigger warning)

Doily wrote:I feel like I need safe adults around me to be able to function. There's this place in my town for mentally ill people to live in where there are sort of nurses around as well, I'd like to go there for a couple of months at least but I don't know how.

You'd need to find out who pays for people to stay there? You probably need a Doctor or something to say you need to go there and why. Maybe your Doctor or Therapist will know who pays for people to stay there?

Suki

ViTheta wrote:Suki,

That sounds a lot like how we evolved in our system. We always had two hosts (Beth and Angel, Bri and Angel, Bri and Beth, Vi and Beth). Now it's mostly Vi and Lilith with the rest of us switching out as needed.


Leila.

Hi Leila

Our front is usually made up of 3 working together to present as one host for each life period there is usually the 'social mask host' who was usually the one went to school/college/ work etc. (years ago they were disconnected and didn't know there were others), an 'Insider' who often surfaced when host was alone and a changeling. Their presence gave the insider the ability to hide undetected and switch quickly in and out.

We don't need the ability to hide from the host these days and some changelings have instead taken on the form of past loved ones on the inside to help with memory issues and keep their memories alive. ..or taking care of other fragmented memory parts. Having one up front though still gives the humans fronting telepathic communication with those inside.

Suki

Hi, Vi here.

We always had two and Queen was always in the background acting as gatekeeper and monitor. Queen is still there now monitoring everything, but stays mostly silent. We're still learning to cope with balancing the system, but it seems like a lot of us are more comfortable being Inside.

We've been learning more and more about everything like ADHD, autism and trauma response. The more we've learned the more we're pretty sure we have ADHD on top of the autism and DID, but that isn't surprising.

Take care,
Vi

Kit is our Gatekeeper and researcher. She's studying Neuroplasticity and Stroke Recovery.

The Tinnitus is bad this morning. I think the Twins had a late night then I remember waking to one of those intense dreams which are more like messages from the inside where I actually remember what was talked about and find I know what the plan is!

Only had about 4 hours of sleep which is probably why its like having a hive of bees buzzing in my head, Kit offered to take Mr Woof out and do and physio, that's woke me up a bit! May need a nap later or sleeping tablets for tonight to try and stay asleep for longer! The T is usually milder on waking if we've managed to get at least 6 hours good sleep! I wonder if its related to the weather too as we're having a lot of thunderstorms almost every day lately due to the high temps..maybe alot of static electricity in the air makes Tinnitus worse?

Jay

I hope that things get better for you Jay. It's going to be raining here with possible thunder most of the week. Our cats are weird as the girl cat loves to sit and watch thunderstorms and the boy cat hides.

We have a phone call with our endocrinologist today, and we're anxious. It feels like she's doing this as a favor because she's the only woman in the practice right now who does transition care and we didn't want to switch to a male doctor. However, she's no longer really doing telemedicine and that's upsetting to us for several reasons.

Oh, and we were going through a spell of doubting that we have DID again...and then I, specifically, remembered the bit about Anderson Cooper and how I had absolutely no idea who he is when we were going through our realization crisis.

We're starting to feel better physically. The issues were probably two medications being out of joint. But we'll be ok.

Vi

I hope things improve for folks who are going through anything rough.

We're having a good day today. Went for a bike ride along the beach, and collected some rocks for Bobby and Oliver. Then we did our other exercises and stretching when we got home, and just ate lunch. We need to work on learning music and movements for the show and then we have rehearsal tonight.

The awful exhaustion we were having has gone away for now, so that's good. We still haven't been able to get enough sleep, but I guess the number of hours is less important than how we feel during the day, so I'm not going to stress about probably only sleeping for about 5 hours last night.

Glad to hear that you were enjoying yourselves and thank you.

Things are better now. Our endocrinologist explained that she didn't necessarily want to not have phone calls with any patients, but there were some she needed to see in person and the nurses apparently thought it was a blanket ban. She's made a note in my records that a phone call with us is fine.

Vi

I think we remembered something for long enough to make an association! Kate thinks we should monitor our blood pressure. so bought am home blood pressure reader thing off ebay ...going to write down the number it gives, the level of Tinnitus and who recorded it (who was fronting at the time).
We think there's a link between the levels of Tinnitus and the levels of dissociation and blood pressure spikes could be part of the issue.

I know some Tinnitus we can't get rid of (in the deaf side) but we can get relief from that via hearing aids.... this is for the Tinnitus that feels like its coming from the other side or back of the head and when we're getting hit by it from all directions loudly and continuously, this when the dissociating is worse triggering switches cos my brain gets too overwhelmed to cope with it anymore after it reaches a certain point, so the others are triggered out to relieve me to give 'this me' a break from it.

Jay

That's excellent. I do hope that works for you. I've noticed something that I won't call tinnitus because it probably isn't, but when we first get up we have this tendency to notice our pulse within the sound of our ear, but it goes away after our blood pressure meds kick in.

Good luck!
Vi

I think it is known as 'pulsate Tinnitus' if its just like your heartbeat/pulse that you can hear ...we've had that too but didn't realise it signalled high blood pressure..in fact the twins liked it cos they hear each others heartbeats and when they clasped hands they could feel two...in the hand and the chest.

Neck pain is another issue and its not cold (usually worse in winter when there's other aches and pains too) so got 'cervical pillow' to try too just in case some of it is due to that... found the neck massager we got one xmas and put it on charge..we'll see if we can work out whether one or both these issues are whats causing the Tinnitus levels to be really high sometimes.

Also looking for foods/supplements that naturally lower blood pressure. The monitor and pillow will be here by the end of the week hopefully. It could be a vascular issue making it so bad though as we did get vein damage from now 2 blood clots (one in 2019 too) and they called the memory issues 'Vascular Thalamic Amnesia' ..cos last mini stroke was in the Thalamus.