How are you today thread (trigger warning)

Hello there. We are new to both the forum and site, and didn't exactly know where to start so... we thought this would've been a good way to start by submitting something here...
(hope that's okay...)

We're not having that much of a good day, and a little under stress. Some things personal, but just generally trying to overcome various anxieties around talking to people and not allowing some of us to bring ourselves down. It's going to take time, but hopefully we'll get there eventually.

Christmas is tomorrow and I am feeling just plain off. Every year since being together with my partner we have got each and every alter their own gifts, to allow them to feel the joy of Christmas and feel more like themselves. However this year I lost my job for my partners family to take care of his brothers children while he works. I'm broke, and have no way of getting gifts to anyone important. I know the gifts are not all that matters... but it is a tradition. We agreed that neither of us would get any gifts for anyone because of the situation... but it makes us feel.... lost. Having the same tradition every year for 8 years... then just... not being able to do it. Messing with my routine. Alters that don't normally appear are now popping out of nowhere in attempts to make them feel more like themselves.. and yet... it is just making my partner upset and confused. Wish there was something more I could do for them to make them feel the joy around this time of year. It's been a long, tedious year for all of us and I wish there was something I could do so it does not end on a bad note. :/ Any advice to something I can do today or tomorrow to help the alters cheer up in the slightest?

-AMY~<3

Hi (:


Could you maybe do a secret Santa thing in your system.. but instead of buying a present, it must be homemade..?
each alter that wants to join in picks another alter to make a present for.. I really like this as a homemade gift; http://www.jamieoliver.com/news-and-fea ... late-bark/
if you don't have the ingredients for that or if no-one would like it..

other suggestions would be something like = if one alter really loves hearts then someone could make a heart shaped card.. or draw a bunch of hearts on the mirror to make them smile when they see it..
Or.. vouchers could be made - so if someone hates cleaning but usually has to, a voucher can be given to them that says something like ''this voucher entitles you to a half hour of cleaning services by _ _ _''
maybe one alter would really like their nails done a different colour or maybe someone would like a different hairstyle..

Happy holidays to everyone!

JosephClaus

Just finished wrapping all the gifts. Literally, I wrapped all of the gifts except for the ones that people bought for me, since my dad and brother can't wrap. I'm not the best at it, but it was a lot easier than I expected it to be. Happy Holidays everyone!

seabreezeblue wrote:Hi (:


Could you maybe do a secret Santa thing in your system.. but instead of buying a present, it must be homemade..?
each alter that wants to join in picks another alter to make a present for.. I really like this as a homemade gift; http://www.jamieoliver.com/news-and-fea ... late-bark/
if you don't have the ingredients for that or if no-one would like it..

other suggestions would be something like = if one alter really loves hearts then someone could make a heart shaped card.. or draw a bunch of hearts on the mirror to make them smile when they see it..
Or.. vouchers could be made - so if someone hates cleaning but usually has to, a voucher can be given to them that says something like ''this voucher entitles you to a half hour of cleaning services by _ _ _''
maybe one alter would really like their nails done a different colour or maybe someone would like a different hairstyle..

Thank you so much, seeing this cheered me up a bit. I love the idea of the vouchers! Tonight I am going to suggest that and get everyone to do that. I think it would be a great Christmas gift. Happy Holidays to you!

~AMY<3

Bewildered.

Met an insider recently, only I was awake and in the shower, normally I am dreaming or half asleep. I guess a long, hot shower is kind of hypnotic.

Anyway, it was a highly charged encounter, this part being upset about something (which I don't remember now), I began explaining that it was fine to be upset and disagree and that we were all sisters, all one, and everybody had a voice and everybody had an opinion.

I was interrupted by otherself asking, "you are not the leader?"
no.
"who is the leader?"
i dont know.
and other self was gone.
and now I don't recall the issue that she was so upset about.

she reminded me a bit of cheetara from the thundercats.

odd. and yet. progress.

Maybe her purpose, at least for now, is to reveal to you that you're not the leader. We had a similar situation about 10 years ago where one of our older kids blurted out, completely out of nowhere, that we had found everyone in the system. This was two years after the last ones had appeared.

We'd recommend not stressing over it. Our previous T used to say, "There's wisdom in the system." The system protects us from learning what we're not yet ready to deal with. And we know that this is important to you and your system.
____________________

(totally unrelated to the above)

We're having a sh*tty day. And it's not even noon yet.



MDs

We were trying to help an alter who is very afraid, we tried to be there and reassure her that we were going to take care of the problem but she didn't believe we could do it. Then she started to collapse and went numb and we started to blend together, and some of the firefighters became very active.

It's really hard. I thought I could help her feel safer, it's discouraging. I can handle her feelings of terror, but the collapse-and-give-up response just pulls me under with her.

cleaning up the internal mess this christmas created
wrist hurting from everyone writing down how they are and what is going on.
step back into acting out the bulimia.
its gonna take days until we have figured out how to help and make a plan how to avoid the worst of this next time.