Questions about flashbacks

When you have flashbacks, are they always of a specific event? Or do you get flashbacks which are just feeling like you used to when those things happened? Like, I often get the feelings I experienced, but not a specific memory, because that particular thing happened so often that it's like my brain can't pick out one specific event. Also, do you ever get the strong feeling that you know what something is like, even if you can't remember ever having experienced it? I often get that if I'm reading or hearing about other people's experiences, that sense of understanding what it's like. I don't know if that's a flashback. It's easy to dismiss it as just strongly empathising. But I'll hear other people (very kind, empathetic people) talking about similar subjects and it'll be quite clear that they don't 'get it' at all. Whereas I'll have a strong sense from inside that 'this is something we know'. I still have a hard time believing it, though. Mind you, I also have a hard time believing the full-on technicolour flashbacks with surround sound and sensations, if they're of something I didn't know about before. All part of the great game of denial, I suppose.

we get both. (yay rainbow colors!)

we get all these kinds of flashbacks:

1) Re-living the event as if it's actually happening again (this would be your full technicolor surround sound system flashback)

2) Replaying the event in our head and having the feelings of it happening again/like we used to when it had happened, but little to no visual hallucinations

3) Seeing flashing images in our head and having the feelings of it happening again

4) Only hearing the sounds in our head from the flashback and having the feelings of it happening again

5) Only having the feelings of it happening again with no visual or auditory part of a flashback (at least not consciously)

6) Only having the images replay with no sound, and no feelings attached (at least, no feelings that we consciously feel). Sorta like watching a flashback video that's been put on mute.

(Think that's it).

(What you're describing sounds a bit "deeper" than regular empathy. With us, there's a clear difference between us being empathetic and picturing what something could be like, and us knowing what something is like because we either experienced the same thing or something similar. It's not necessarily a flashback, unless it causes you to feel like you used to when those things happened, but it's just like a "deeper" sense of understanding and empathy because you've either been there or someplace similar yourself, so you can relate more. ~Phenix)

I get feeling attached to whole periods of my life, but I can't remember it at all. I get one picture. Then it represents the whole period. There's a feeling of loneliness that you can almost touch.
I also get random feelings in my body, like memories but with nothing else attached.
Then you hear someone one talk. About something deep. And you don't remember, but you know. You feel it deep inside.
The times you relive it can suck.

For some reason I think I know what it feels like to be shot in the head. I also seem to know what it. Is like to have been through the Holocaust. Too much tv mixed with an overactive imagination?

From what I hear, Alters can have memories of things the body never went through, like war or something...

OK I'm stepping in. She never lets me write on here. The reason you feel like you know things is because you do. Well we do. Some of us. You have no idea how lucky you are to have the choice of believing some of these things didn't happen or that you're making it up. I wish I did make it up. - Jake

Sh*t I really feel like I'm faking this, but I know there's been plenty of times he's wanted to say something and I haven't let him and he's never pushed it. So it seems unfair to delete this.

Owleyes wrote:OK I'm stepping in. She never lets me write on here. The reason you feel like you know things is because you do. Well we do. Some of us. You have no idea how lucky you are to have the choice of believing some of these things didn't happen or that you're making it up. I wish I did make it up. - Jake

Nice to meet and hear from you, Jake. I'm glad she let this be posted. I'm sorry that you know and have been through such experiences, and while I wish you hadn't experienced them, Hawk's always telling me, "We are who we are today because of the experiences we've had, both the good and the bad. And I wouldn't change us, so I wouldn't change any of our experiences, bad as they may be". And I feel there's some truth to that, and hope it helps you feel a bit better. It helped me to.

~Phenix

Owleyes wrote:Sh*t I really feel like I'm faking this, but I know there's been plenty of times he's wanted to say something and I haven't let him and he's never pushed it. So it seems unfair to delete this.

It would be unfair. I'm glad that you were able to keep it and post it, congratulations to you for that!

If I deleted everything that I thought I was faking, or I felt like I was faking, I'd have like, no posts at all on here! I'd probably have an easily countable total of posts, like, 20 or something, compared to how much I've/we've actually posted.

This is just a mixture of denial, and it being new to you to let him post. Give yourself time to adjust to the new-ness, and fight the denial. It gets better over time.

-Cassandra

tomboy24 wrote:

Owleyes wrote:Sh*t I really feel like I'm faking this, but I know there's been plenty of times he's wanted to say something and I haven't let him and he's never pushed it. So it seems unfair to delete this.

It would be unfair. I'm glad that you were able to keep it and post it, congratulations to you for that!

If I deleted everything that I thought I was faking, or I felt like I was faking, I'd have like, no posts at all on here! I'd probably have an easily countable total of posts, like, 20 or something, compared to how much I've/we've actually posted.

This is just a mixture of denial, and it being new to you to let him post. Give yourself time to adjust to the new-ness, and fight the denial. It gets better over time.

-Cassandra

It took me a while to stop erasing posts and lines of text that seemed odd for me. Things actually started getting better when I did though, so I take it as improvement. Now I just move them into more convenient or understandable locations. Things even stopped appearing in parenthesis. I now have to go back and check my posts though. If I don't I never even remember it. When I look at it, I remember it like from a dream now. And My friend has found he actually likes talking to most of them too. So Congratulations on not deleting it! That's a big step.

tomboy24 wrote:This is just a mixture of denial, and it being new to you to let him post. Give yourself time to adjust to the new-ness, and fight the denial. It gets better over time.

ThatPerson wrote:So Congratulations on not deleting it! That's a big step.

I dunno, it's kind of freaky I never know what he might say.

Owleyes wrote:I dunno, it's kind of freaky I never know what he might say.

Welcome to my world. Some of the time I don't know when others post because they're scared I'll delete it or not let them post it or something, so they hide the fact that they're posting from me, and something they'll even hide their posts by just not letting me see that it's there! (Kinda like how you can censor things on TV, that's kinda like what they do to me sometimes, censor things so I don't see them or know they're there, especially on here). This used to happen for almost every post, but now that I've gotten more used to letting others post on here, it happens less often. Still happens, especially with "new" alters, but it's definitely less often than it used to be.

Other times they get fed up with me and then I get to go through the experience of watching my hands type and pressing "submit" without me having any say in it whatsoever.


It can be hard letting go, I know. But trust me as someone who's found/is still finding many posts that they don't remember doing, it does get easier, and it does get less "freaky". It doesn't ever get any less surprising, but it does definitely get easier and less "freaky".

He's a part of you, and you're a part of him. And he has every right to say anything he's comfortable with saying, just as you have every right to say anything you're comfortable with saying. He has all the same rights you do to express himself, be heard, vent, rant, etc. If you're worried about what he might say, perhaps come up with some general guidelines for everyone that may want to post/say something for what's ok and what's not really ok (either in general or for your comfortability level).

Perhaps work on some relaxation/calming techniques to help you feel more comfortable about everything. And reassure yourself that you are ok, everything is ok, it is ok for them to be out/forward, this is a safe place here where it's ok for you and anyone else in your system to "talk", etc.


-Cassandra