Communication between alters *category triggers

The point of this thread is to share ways that we can communicate with the alters inside.

I was writing about this in an answer to my T today and thought I would bring the question here as well. Many of us have struggled with how to communicate better with those inside.


Some alters inside talk to each other so easily now we are the state that all alters know of each other and we have done a great deal of pre-trauma processing integration. Jessica the last host experiences this now. She is an ANP (past host) like many others and is included in many conversations inside. I have heard alters cry out for help, for Mommy. In Walmart one day I heard 2 alters talking back and forth. I have heard so many talk at once it was like being in a crowded room with everyone talking at once. Peyton, (who I called Doom before I knew how to ask their names) has always shoved her thoughts into my head, but it's hard to know my thoughts from hers when I have heard hers too my whole life. Her thoughts are usually SHOCKING though, and I find myself saying - I do not really think that! Ouch!!!! Otherwise I would never really have paid attention to them.

Perhaps it is the concentration on this intrusion of thoughts that allows one to hear actual communication. As I write this I am getting a great deal of confirmation in my head.


I do have a form of communication with alters that is magnificent, but time consuming. Alters can answer any yes or no question, they can interject feelings to go along with those and they can spell out anything. When they spell things I know I have not misinterpreted anything. For instance, I am working on events that bother certain alters right now. This is from last night. I have to be very careful to never lead them. I want them to answer in their very own words.


A trauma memory - triggering of course*
This is just one memory of mine to use for an example.

Ice - Observing EP: Remembers this event and those involved and she gives the order they are in this story.

Frayda - (ANP) L16
Raine - (ANP) 14
Frank the Snake - (ANP) L1
Demetrius - (EP) L20 takes over for all 3 ANP for trauma parts.

Frayda L16 - 4 years old
Frayda spells what she wants us to know about this:

Killer knows mom.
Mister Neil is a killer.
I Love Bruno.
Mister Neil makes me cry.

Raine - (ANP) 14

I hate everyone at the evil place.
Mister Neil SMOTHERED me!
I was going to die.
Father owed Mister Neil money
Father owed money for me being bad
Father says use woman must pay
Pay for sex.
Men wash it in me. (Ice has to come help to say what it is)
It is men's d***. (much pain and turning away to spell even with Ice's help)
Mister Neil was looking at Tylas
Very little Tylas.
Father got money for little Tylas
Not enough money.
No money from Mister Neil.

Frank the Snake spells out:

Mister Neil steals our money
Money of ours
Puppy is dead
Mister Neil is a monster
Mister Neil is numb to sex toys.
Mister Neil may sell me
Because I am bad.
Puppy goes to heaven
Never over killing puppy

Demetrius - (EP) L20
Takes over for all 3 above as the EP
Demetrius spells out:

Die being smothered
Sex Mister Neil

How it started with me was I told myself it was okay to remember and was then flooded with dreams and alters coming out. I wanted to communicate with them and kept asking questions of them. I could not understand what they were trying to tell me. Then we got down a way of communicating that worked well. If the answer was yes, they would smile/frown, etc... If the answer was no, there would be nothing. This is still what we do after 2 years now of trying to communicate better. For the spelling it's the same thing - it's a tedious process. It goes something like this.

1. Can you spell? If no they have to find another alter inside to help with that. I learned that one out the hard way! I thought it was lack of communication, but it was spelling issues or even emotional issues about what they were spelling.

2. Spell what you want me to know.

First letter - Then I go through the whole alphabet and they smile when I get to the letter they want. I check that I got the correct letter. Then once a word is spelled, I check that I got the right word.

3. Sometimes it's a word or sentence they are not allowed to spell, so they have to get an alter to do it that can. Often it takes 2 to 3 alters working together to spell a word or sentence.

4. This is exhausting for some reason, so keep that in mind.

For us, we generally communicate decently. Your method sounds extremely tedious, but much more precise. I think it would drive us crazy, because when we are inside, we don't usually communicate with just words. Especially LEll and Teen. They also communicate largely with emotion. We tend to project emotion onto one another far easier than actual words. It can get confusing if we weren't already communicating and it suddenly comes up - sometimes we can't even tell if it's our own feelings or not. But when we are communicating, it's generally an aura or an emotion.

Example: Say I'm talking with my best friend, and Jen becomes co-conscious (I happen to feel it this time - I don't always). So I let her know that Jen is there, out of courtesy. My friend asks Jen if she will be able to hang out tomorrow sometime. Jen replies "For what?" Sarah says "Just to hang out, maybe go to the mall." Jen replies "I was going to let the kid out (here I get an impression of mid-day, but no actual words) and then I can hang out sometime after that (here I get an unsure aura)." My translation of this would be choppy - I'd probably say, "She says that she wanted to let LElly out sometime in the afternoonish but she will be able to hang out after that. Maybe." Not exact words, but if I got anything wrong, she'd probably be quick to correct me, so I don't worry too much. However, say the same thing happened with LElly. My friend says, "Do you want to do something tomorrow?" And I'd probably only get the aura of a question mark from her. That could be almost anything. So I tell her to be more specific. Then she might use a few words. She says "Do what?" My friend replies, "We could make cupcakes." And I probably get a loud squeal of glee, which I may or may not actually hear. Which I'll tell my friend, "Yeah, she likes that idea."

So much less specific, but much easier. Not sure it would work for memory sharing, though. Especially if the memory is painful - I'd be likely to just get an emotion every time a word came up that they didn't like. Which would be rather unproductive.

When it is with words, it's usually like the imaginary conversations I've always had. I even suspect some of it wasn't imaginary ("imaginary" friends?). This makes it very hard to separate imaginary words from real 'voices'. But sometimes, the 'real voices' have a distinct property. It feels more like it's pushed to me, like it is meant to be brought to my attention - as opposed to the imaginary ones, which never have that property (they are imagined by me, somehow, so they can't be pushed towards me and can't be intrusive either). They are more like voices (having a distinct voice). And they seem to be more 'hollow' or seem to occupy more space.

There are still things to learn about this. For example, that it doesn't help when one says something, I ask a name and someone else answers... At least, that's what I think happens. And I'm usually highly co-conscious. This means I usually get the thought before the words. Then I don't know whether it's just some random thought out of nowhere or coming from an alter.

When it's without words, I just seem to 'know' what is being asked. It is confusing most of the time, as I usually don't know for sure who says it. Sometimes it just seems to be halfway thoughts/words. And it's hard to distinguish whether it was actually just me thinking. The only reliable way is when I'm asked to do things I don't really want (nothing harmful). Or when they are clearly intrusive and egodystonic and keep reappearing after dismissing them.

I don't switch *that I know of* (they disagree with this). And acting through - it probably happens but I'm still figuring out when this happens so I can't really use it as a way of communication. It never happens when I don't want it, so that makes detecting it hard.

I'll watch this thread as I'm interested in what others will add.

We will be keeping an eye on this post. Yeah, it's right up our alley, yo. We need to learn to communicate with Jo. Within Miranda we communicate telepathically, both words and images. But we cannot with Jo, except a few words: DID is not real.

This is Alysone. Mostly when they have something important to share, or when I want to know something it usually works best to let them write to me. That's how I've found our about mist of my memories. Sometimes I get a thought that doesn't seem like mine and I know its one of my alters. Desiree and Shamer hear everything inside and they pay attention to the outside too. I'm not co-conciious yet with Desiree and Shamer, but I was with the other alters before I integrated them. Writing has been the most healing for me and helps me know what's going on. Alysone

Here are the ways we talk, some can use 1 or none or all of these etc:
* flashing images for another one
* "loud thoughts" (e.g one hears us like a "loud thought")
* talking (sounds like talking from the inside of the head, but usually very loudly - this rarely happens though)
* writing to each other on the outside
* using sign language on the outside (while someone inside sees)
* drawing what we're trying to say
* twitches (like saying "if you're saying yes, could you make my brow twitch, if you're saying no, make my leg switch" for instance -- this was mostly done before certain alters could hear one another though)
* playing music inside the head (the lyrics usually reflect what the person is trying to say)

Don't know if any of this was what you meant but I'm a bit numb in my head right now, sorry.

I'm quite lucky that communication comes easily with my alters. If they want something they'll make themselves known. It's interesting as a lot of the time they speak outside of my head and I can sort of tell where they are in my room. They have their own places, ones they feel the most comfortable sitting e.g Ted will always be on my bed or Scott will be sat on the floor by my radiator.
I hear them inside my head a lot as well and often hear them as "loud thoughts" as people have mentioned. If ever they require something they'll simply say, so I can hear it or think it. I will normally be able to pick up on their thoughts.

They will occasionally write if they are unable to get in touch with me via speaking but for me I talk to my alters pretty much everyday. I often respond out loud as if talking to a person in the room. Once I get talking to one we can talk for hours. That's just how my system works though. Sometimes I write down conversations that we have if I feel the conversation is important and worth reflecting upon at a later date.

lifelongthing wrote:Don't know if any of this was what you meant but I'm a bit numb in my head right now, sorry.

Yes, anything you or your T has figured out to help the host communicate with the alters inside.


I need to add one thing to mine. I did a lot of pre-trauma processing integration and recently with a focus on memory sharing. It is the various alters now getting together to make sense of the bits and pieces of their memories.