Came back for christmas

since I retired from host I had to still attend christmas and my father is back so... I'm auto out you could say but usually I want to be back after that. but I'm just not feeling any passion for life anymore and its not suicidal. we are not happy we don't feel joyous alive or anything anymore I'm starting to think that what we wanted was wrong. Are days are getting more and more blank.
are old host used to make us feel so alive and happy we hit are downs but that was okay who doesn't. everyone is fighting in here I just don't know what to do. -Channelle

When our system family is at odds inside...it usually is a reflection of unresolved issues on the outside. It sounds like Christmas and seeing dad/others might have brought up some conflict. And maybe nothing traumatic as much as just that stress that comes with the holidays - we all put on happy faces even though driving was a pain or wrapping presents was a pain or money is tight or whatever...

Frustration inside usually means a need is not being met or a feeling is being stuffed. Does any of that make you say "Yeah - this!!!" Whoever seems to get along with everyone the most or the 'head of the house' in your system may need to sit everyone down and remind them that you are all in this together and it does no good to hurt one another with attitude or words/actions...what is it someone needs they don't feel they're getting? Who can mediate?

As far as joy/happiness....it seems pretty normal that you might have a 'blah' period...we all get those. How do we get out of them? Well...when my son is feeling pretty blah or upset, he lets one of the Littles come out who loves to draw or something...Sharon, especially....if she gets time to be a kid, (host) comes back and gets to experience some risidual joy...which promotes his finding things to be happy about himself. Sometimes Miteara needs to vent...and after she gets it out to me, the whole system relaxes a little.... Maybe you could ask if anyone wants to come on the board and vent if they don't want to to anyone inside or outside there??