Attachment

Hi guys and girls,

Couldn't find another thread about this as yet.

I've been recognising some of the importance of 'attachment' in my system. As if there has been or never was the right form of attachment in the first place, as if im missing it completely. as if its a root problem that as affected my whole life. The 'splits' therefore make sense to me, as does the last 20+ years of not feeling attached.

I'm wondering what other people know abut this in theory and from experience?
Or what are some of the other roots of d.i.d that people know of?

-- Mon Nov 12, 2012 2:20 pm --

Oh, ok I've just found 3143 results for attachment, I'd spelt it wrong

Probably our best thread on attachment is this one:

DID Forum: Attachment

Brilliant! Thank you..

Read this page. Attachment is the all important issue with DID.

http://www.dissociative-identity-disord ... ology.html

Tylas, I rather resent your flogging your personal web pages here.

Fightforlife wrote:I've been recognising some of the importance of 'attachment' in my system. As if there has been or never was the right form of attachment in the first place, as if im missing it completely. as if its a root problem that as affected my whole life. The 'splits' therefore make sense to me, as does the last 20+ years of not feeling attached.

I think it's interesting you say this as I'm at the point now where I'm just starting to feel a bit more attached to my therapist and a little bit more secure about it than earlier on. It's making me realise that this feeling of a safe attachment is something that I've definitely been missing completely my whole life and I never ever knew it until I started to feel attached. It seems like a really weird feeling to me because I'm not used to it.

Oddly, after being a bit attached to my therapist (male therapist), I'm gradually starting to notice an intensely dramatic shift in the type of men I'm romantically attracted to.

Has there been anything in particular happening for you lately that has been making you realise that lack of the right form of attachment has been a core thing that has affected you?

I've been trying to remember why I thought attachment was important.
I think, for me, it's because of becoming aware more of vulnerability, danger, fear, or perhaps there are specific events which may have produced a 'detachment' or broken an attachment. i just feel the splits that i have have occured from a certain point. like using that epicentre of an earthquake anaology. the ripples may be my splits, but i kind of feel that there has been epicentres in me where proper attachment has been lost, ie, the connections broken, or plug been pulled out and i switched off. so maybe when trauma happens, the attachment is kind of lost and thus has to be reformed? Which is what is happening for me now, and I've bad to come back to my epicenters and go from there.

Almost feel like a wires been cut right down the middle with a pair or scissors, hence no attachment. Anyone have those feelings? I think traumas can break attachment like the cutting of a wire or cause it to snap?

A bit like a chain effect, all my splits seem to have started connecting up with one another and forming an attachment at least with themselves, which then creates a chain, which makes me feel stronger. As a result, ive been noticing some shifts too. Ie I feel more confident to have better friends, make better decisions. Feelings of accepting comfort or feeling secure with someone as you say. I don't think it's so much being attached to other people yet, but within myself. I just get the feeling that its really important that i be attached to myself again, then perhaps I can work on being attached to others in the right ways too.

Una+ wrote:Tylas, I rather resent your flogging your personal web pages here.

Um. Hi. I'm new here kinda I guess, whatever, so I don't wanna start anything, and I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but who cares where the info comes from if it's helpful and given with good intentions and stuff? It was made to be referenced and stuff, right? To help others and be a resource? So who cares who references it? Like, if I had referenced it, would you have made this comment?

I've been reading the website, the dissociative-identity-disorder.org website that Tylas referenced. It's been helpful. I'm still confused on a lot but I'm slowly learning what all could be going on and like possible explanations and stuff.

~Kyra (13 yr old)

I found it helpful at the time, if its accurate info. Depends on the persons motivation for sharing it. Thanks if it was conscientiously done. Wouldn't want someone flogging their own stuff at me all the time though if it was just to get more promotion or whatever.

It says it's been reviewed by Tom Cloyd, MA, MS, and when you click on his name he's legit and stuff. I'm...hearing stuff.... I dunno Tylas or anything 'cause I'm new here kinda whatever but I hear...something.... There's a voice saying this: "Tylas created two websites as an attempt to help increase awareness and information availability. If she had created them for personal gain, or if I believed her to be "flogging" her websites for personal gain here, I would not reference them myself and I would not have posted them in the DDNOS/DID RESOURCES thread".

I haven't heard that voice before...have I? It wasn't angry...It wasn't like either of the L.C. voices I used to hear...weird...

Anyway, um, yeah...I guess that's all I wanted to say.

~Kyra (13 yr old)