Fight Club

You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your ######6 khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

we judge, but we have no idea..


so i'll start, please don't judge me anymore, maybe you will all understand why i am the way i am after i tell you all this, maybe you could tell me who i am


i have been mentally and emotionally abused for my entire life by my parents

yes i smoke weed, it makes me happy

do you know where i live?

i live in a house in lower TN where the weather gets down to the 30s regularily, and i have never had heat in my house

my roof in my room leaks

and i probably have mold somwhere, or espestice in my house

my dad has had a frontal lobe injury, and thats why he only cares about the dogs

he doesn't love me, he isn't real

my momther has to work because my father won't make enough money for us to eat

even though he's a chiropractor

he's just inexpenzive, but we could be well off, remember he's, it's like he has no soul, because of the frontal lobe injury, o well, he slammed throught the windshield going about thirty, and then came back out and wnet out the door and tumbled about 30 feet or so and was in a coma for about 2 weeks, and he was abused all his life by his mother and stepfathers

my mother comes from a rich family, where her father was a workaholic, and he mother was the perfect housewife that didn't appreciate her daughter and told her that she was fat

he started beating my mother when they first got married, she went to the hospital a few times

he had to stop when she got pregnant

i am so paranoid, i have been afraid that he was going to hit me, or worse rape me at times, my father really creeps me out

and yet my mother has still not taken us away from him

she has been saying since i was at least 12, that we are going to move, and that things are going to get better, i am 19, and things have gotten worse...

my father picks our dogs fleas, manually with his fingers, it's discusting

we have a few field mice living in our house

oh, and did i mention the roaches

we used to have 7 dogs, we live on less than an acre of land, and the dogs used to live in the house, well the three left still do...and he wants to start breeding again, to start a pack"

i want to be taken away, far away, where he cna't yell at me anymore, where niether of thm can judge me, and i can just breathe, and be happy, and live, and love

and everytime that i get close

i get turned away

nobody wants me, i am unloved, as always, this is proof that "God" does not exist

if he did, and he loved me, then why would he have sent so many people into such horrible places as this

oh, and did i mention? our plumbing doesn't work, and my roof leaks, hah, one time i had ants invade my room, so i got the vacum to suck them up, what did my dad have to say, i'll be damned if you want ME to go to wal mart tonight to get some ant killer

i wasn't stupid! i didn't ask, i was just vacumming up the millions of ants pouring into my room and ant larve and ant sacks of babies, i supposed, they looked like worms, worms make me throw up

survival of the fittest, it is in this life, my sister has survived and gone off on her own and is teaching a college class and getting paid to be a student in graduate school, what's going to save me? i sure as hell do not have her brain...

i wish that i could just go back to my chilhood, where i didn't have to think about all these things, i didn't have this mind that entraps me as i do now, that i was free-er in my ignorance, in my belief of santa, and that majic is real

humans are sick u know?

Look, i read ur thread 2 times.

The situation itself looks very f*cked up but there's always a way out.
The only thing i can tell you is that you need to start thinking about urself and if ur mother is not doing anything to take u out of there you should find your own way out.
I really dont know how u managed to stay all these years living like this, u're very strong.

Start looking for options, get a job or something, get the hell out of there before is too late.

you totally deserve a better life.

thank you for your kind words, maybe i'll find a job and start living on my own

oo i have an update, i know you wanna know!!!

what is it?


what is it??


ok, i'll tell ya!!


well, I had a bad day, last sunday, and monday, so two bad days, and then i got up out of my hazey fog of weed, and quit, cold turkey, and it's still hard. and i knew that i was not feeling like i should, so i upped my meds to 60 mg of prozac, and g-damn! i feel ######6 good:) and i yea, i feel like i'm living life now:) and i got a a hamster, it's name is, are you ready for this, Annabelle Getrude of The Galactic Conquest for The Destruction of Earth, haha, i love stupid crap like that, it's what makes my world go round, well just thought i'd update:) how is everyone else, and guests, how are you guys?

Yeah, life does suck a lot some times. I just quit weed too. Well, sort of. Myself and my roommate have decided to go cold turkey for a few months at least. But we took the last 7 grams we had between us and baked some brownies. So tonight we're going to eat them all and have a good ol' happyfunmovie night.

When I was down, I got a few pets too. Got a bunch of fish and snails. Named the two fish Gumby and ###$ (Trailer Park Boys fans will understand the refrance). I wanted something furry but my other roommate is allergic.

hamsters are awesome, or a mousie, you can train those, and for her allergies, if they aren't horrible, it may be somthing that a benydryl can fix:) just make sure to get used to them, they can make you sleepy at first because they have a sleep aid in them, but i'm used to it and can stay awake on one, kudos for the brownies, never tried that, but i've always wanted to, i think i'll quit when everythign i have is gone, cause i still have hash, and yea, i wanna use that lol, bybye!

i think you have a great sense of humour:) so what's going on with you now?

moramind wrote:we judge, but we have no idea..


so i'll start, please don't judge me anymore, maybe you will all understand why i am the way i am after i tell you all this, maybe you could tell me who i am


i have been mentally and emotionally abused for my entire life by my parents

yes i smoke weed, it makes me happy

do you know where i live?

i live in a house in lower TN where the weather gets down to the 30s regularily, and i have never had heat in my house

my roof in my room leaks

and i probably have mold somwhere, or espestice in my house

my dad has had a frontal lobe injury, and thats why he only cares about the dogs

he doesn't love me, he isn't real

my momther has to work because my father won't make enough money for us to eat

even though he's a chiropractor

he's just inexpenzive, but we could be well off, remember he's, it's like he has no soul, because of the frontal lobe injury, o well, he slammed throught the windshield going about thirty, and then came back out and wnet out the door and tumbled about 30 feet or so and was in a coma for about 2 weeks, and he was abused all his life by his mother and stepfathers

my mother comes from a rich family, where her father was a workaholic, and he mother was the perfect housewife that didn't appreciate her daughter and told her that she was fat

he started beating my mother when they first got married, she went to the hospital a few times

he had to stop when she got pregnant

i am so paranoid, i have been afraid that he was going to hit me, or worse rape me at times, my father really creeps me out

and yet my mother has still not taken us away from him

she has been saying since i was at least 12, that we are going to move, and that things are going to get better, i am 19, and things have gotten worse...

my father picks our dogs fleas, manually with his fingers, it's discusting

we have a few field mice living in our house

oh, and did i mention the roaches

we used to have 7 dogs, we live on less than an acre of land, and the dogs used to live in the house, well the three left still do...and he wants to start breeding again, to start a pack"

i want to be taken away, far away, where he cna't yell at me anymore, where niether of thm can judge me, and i can just breathe, and be happy, and live, and love

and everytime that i get close

i get turned away

nobody wants me, i am unloved, as always, this is proof that "God" does not exist

if he did, and he loved me, then why would he have sent so many people into such horrible places as this

oh, and did i mention? our plumbing doesn't work, and my roof leaks, hah, one time i had ants invade my room, so i got the vacum to suck them up, what did my dad have to say, i'll be damned if you want ME to go to wal mart tonight to get some ant killer

i wasn't stupid! i didn't ask, i was just vacumming up the millions of ants pouring into my room and ant larve and ant sacks of babies, i supposed, they looked like worms, worms make me throw up

survival of the fittest, it is in this life, my sister has survived and gone off on her own and is teaching a college class and getting paid to be a student in graduate school, what's going to save me? i sure as hell do not have her brain...

i wish that i could just go back to my chilhood, where i didn't have to think about all these things, i didn't have this mind that entraps me as i do now, that i was free-er in my ignorance, in my belief of santa, and that majic is real

humans are sick u know?

YYYYYEEEESSSSS! I TOO SMOKE MARIJUANA!