I WANNA DIE CAN ANYONE HELP

God tonight I feel so #######5 and depressed its not even funny. Right now as I am righting this I am so feeling like killing myself. My lief my pride have been broken, I hat myself and my ###$ up #######5 life. I dont wanna go on feeling like this , feeling like a worthless ###$ up coward whom has ###$ up every damn thing in my life.

Hey Babe

I'm sorry you're feeling down again. It'll be okay though. THings will get better again!! *hugs* I know it will. Tonight hasn't been the greatest for me either. It'll get better though.

Hi,

I'm not sure what your situation is, but it's likely been building, and you've been suffering for a long time?

So, anyone in such a situation, where things don't get better, just worse would want to just leave, get away, die. Kind of like a sports team losing really badly, the crowd booing them, and they still have half the game to keep losing, do they want to keep going? No.

Is it that you want really for you to lose consciousness and die, or just want the pain to go away. If you were that sports team, and you started beating the other team, would you still want to quit? This is what you need to figure out. If you're not completely sure you want to die, or have the slightest doubts, then you shouldn't do it.

I went from feeling like I could hardly move, get up out of bed, eat food, or even notice what was happening around me, really thinking I deserved to die to feeling better than I ever had. What it took was ECT. ECT is kind of like death in a way, but it will make your mind and body stop hurting. It is a little dangerous, but they take steps to minimize any problems. There's a lot of misinformation about it out there, ignore it.

At this point, you have nothing to lose.

This $#%^ right here is for you.
All your faces I can see.
You all think it's about me.
I'm about to break.
This is my fate
Am I still damned to a life
Of misery and hate.

You would never known.
What I've done for you.
What you may put me through.
I'd do it for you.
I could have never lived.
If it wasn't for you. But
all I want in life is to be happy (happy).
It seems funny to me.
How ###$ things can be.
Everytime I get head.
I feel more dead.

Hello everyone my name is Jack or Jeff I am writing this so I can get something off my chest. I am depressed well actually very very depressed because I have been gay bashed, threatend, harrassed, bullied, picked on, and have had deaths threats made toward me. I for one am ######6 sick of this $#%^ ok. Also I dont even know if I am gay because I dont know what to belive anymore. I am a peaceful person so why the ###$ do ppl have to mess with me. I have felt like killing myself for a while but have held on cause of my faith with jesus and my friends and some famil mambers. I have a saying and it goes like this. " I was raised with respect not

I feel so #######5 today, I am so sorry I am so ######6 cold, I dont know why this pain ######6 hurts me the way it does maybe its because I am letting it I dont know, I dont what to think anymore cause I dont even know my own damn thought pattern anymore. I just wanna make the pain go away and erase myself from existance. Why do I have a conscience? All it does is ###$ with me. Why do I have this torment? All I want to do is ###$ it away.



I feel so ######6 crappy right now. I just feel so damn ugly inside and out. For a while now I have had this werid feeling in the pit of my stomach and just recently I found out what it was, the feeling is that something has been raped and stolen from me and its called my pride, my ego, my selfesteem, and my life. Why must life mess with me? Why cant it chill and let me be free? There is another question I have always asked myself, why was I born onto this earth? Just so I can have ###$ up feelings, emotions, and all this hate bottled up inside. I have tried so hard to please ppl but yet they still tear me down wtf is wrong with ppl now a days? Bunch is sick ######6 stero types.

Hey jack,
I'm sorry but I don't have much time. I just want to tell you to hang in there. But I don't think there's much more that I can do for you, until you take the advice that I've been giving you all along. Not saying that I'm giving up on you or anything like that, I'm just saying I don't know what to do.

Element I am hanging in there, once I am able to get enough money then I will get halp and suppport. Hows that sound everyone?

There is another question I have always asked myself, why was I born onto this earth? Just so I can have ###$ up feelings, emotions, and all this hate bottled up inside. I have tried so hard to please ppl but yet they still tear me down wtf is wrong with ppl now a days? Bunch is sick ######6 stero types.

My take on your question....based on my faith of course....I believe God put each of us here for a reason...well actually...I personally believe we chose to come here...I believe that "on the other side" we choose who we want for our parents and we choose our life experiences. I believe we are meant to learn from them too. I believe that while some are here they are meant for great things. I believe some are meant to acheive fame or great wealth. I believe others are meant to do great things known world wide for various causes. I believe there are those that are meant not to do anything so much news worth or of celebrity status but that there are those who are meant to live "hum drum" lives! I believe God has lessons for us to learn in life no matter what ...my own life...I'm nothing special...I'm married....mom of two....I'm a stay-at-home mom for the time being....I have friends. I don't do anything so much that I'll be remembered on some national level when I die ...but I believe I do things that matter to others all the same. Those close in my life. I make a difference in my friends lives...or so they tell me. I'm told I'm caring and compassionate. I do things small scale. I've made many mistakes in life and I've learned a LOT from them...and have tried to teach others from my examples. I've known personal pain in my life. I was sexually abused and I've sufferred greatly in my life for that. I'm made some personal choices that have hurt me (and others) in my life and have sufferred for that .But from each bad experience....I have learned. Some things I've overcome completely....others I still struggle w/.

There is that saying that life is what you make of it. If you are handed lemons...make lemonaide! Or something like that anyway!! I believe that even those of us who have come from and have known personally the worst and most horrible circumstances can rise up out of the ashes and life can be better.

Why does God put us here? I don't know so much that I believe God put me here so much as I believe it's what I chose on the other side. I believe on the otherside, before I was born into this world, I choose what I wanted to experience and learn. I believe I chose my parents and many other things for specific reasons. Too bad we couldn't have a little cheat sheet w/ that to carry over huh?!!! I didn't always used to subscribe to this sort of belief. And really....I won't know if I'm anywhere close on my belief til I die of course .But hey....for now....it works for me. Really....whatever your beliefs are about God and heaven, etc. .......I still believe you have choices here. Have you talked w/ your parents? Do they know what is going on w/ the bullying, etc. and the degree of it? What about switching schools....are they up for moving?....what about home schooling? Course you have to realize that you can't run from your problems. At some point you have to face your fears. And maybe not so much staring down the bullies...why waste your efforts there. You won't change them. But taking from that example to face down other things you can control for yourself.

You know...as I ramble on here....another thing you said....you said how you've spent all this time in your life trying to please others. You are going about things backward! You need to be living this life for YOU, not for someone else. You have to make choices that work for you, not for how you hope someone will perceive you if you make a particular choice. Now...I don't mean to throw that out there as your excuse to just walk all over people and then say "hey....I learned a long time ago that I have to live my life for me"! I hate when people do that! I mean I'd like to hope that when people realize they have to stop being a doormat and making choices that they think please others and they start making choices for themselves....that they make choices for themselves that are positive ones and ones that truly feel right for them. Because I can't imagine walking all over someone truly making you feel like a decent person.


Well I'm going on and on here on a few topics. Maybe you can take something from all of it that is positive for you to build on....maybe you can't agree w/ any of it. That's ok too. I offer it up all the same!

NOT SO MUCH MORE___WHEN IT IS I THAT WANTS TO DIE