Anonymous wrote:But I've never been to a doctor/psychiater so I don't know for sure. I don't want to go since I want to solve everything myself and don't like medication.
Like you, I also thought this way about both physicians (all kinds, including psychiatrists) and medications for many, many years. I just recently began to open up to the idea last year when I really starting plummeting and couldn't pull myself out of it using only my own methods.

I've recently come to realize that this way of thinking might have been because I've always been extremely independent and quite a perfectionist (some characteristics of OCPD, Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder).
Anonymous wrote:My main problems are that I have zero energy and zero confidence, so I can't/don't do anything. Sometimes I try to get active but I give up after one day since everything is hopeless. I have no hope, desire and don't care about anything. Maybe I'm just really lazy, or is this the depression? I would like to have a life but without energy or confidence it's impossible.
I have also been feeling
exactly this way very recently. It's funny that you mention the lazy vs. depression question because I just recently was wondering to myself:
What's the difference between them? Perhaps 20 years ago, my grandfather would cuss his nephew for being lazy; however, now that I look back on it, I think his nephew was actually depressed. But, I guess depression, as a medical condition, wasn't nearly as known then as it is today.
Anonymous wrote:Excuse my English I'm a foreigner.
Actually, your writing is one of the best I've seen.