by Sylvester7 » Sat Oct 27, 2018 1:16 am
I have been clinically diagnosed with depression. Ive been struggling with apathy, emptiness, sadness, and the typical symptoms associated with Major Depressive Disorder. To give insight, my apathy goes as deep as not caring deeply(misanthropic too) about any human beings including family(not malicious) and especially, close friends. I would be affected by my relatives death but not a friend. I have zero drive or ambition to do anything, but I know it is a problem. I'm on autopilot everyday, forcing myself to interact normally with others even though I'm deeply in "pain". I've always been apathetic as a child, but as a teen it has been made worse (16) and some of my family members have the same problem. Medication does not help enough to change any of my behaviours. The problem with me is that I cannot assign value to anything mentally, so I lack purpose. I have tried dietary changes and I am emotionally flatlining in terms of positive emotion. Nothing ever has clicked in my brain so I deeply think it will not change anything. So, I come here to ask for advice/words that can help me through this