No bread and butter for living

I have been in antipsychotic medicine for about 7 years.I have been psychologically ill-treated by my parents, and emotionally I have broken all connection with them. I don't feel like I should take any help from them, neither I feel I have anyone in this world. Seem I have become just a burden in this world. I am an introvert, so very fewer friends. I have neither money now to even do my living. I can't go home, neither I like to. They always criticize me for money. For my parent's money is everything for them. They can go to any level to torture me, scold me for not having an income. They wanted me to do the job, but I was not interested in it. I wanted to be become an entrepreneur, but I was staying in the home for it. But my mother tortured me daily in an extreme level which was beyond tolerance. My father is an alcoholic, who will come home and create all disturbances and quarrel in the home.
I just can't trust anyone in my family. My thoughts just don't match at all with them. I have gone paranoid and suspicious of everything. Like people are following me, the camera is installed in my room etc. I was doing tuitions but all my students have stopped coming without giving genuine reasons.
I can't claim even an independent life because my parents will not permit me. I can grow my food so that I don't starve and die, but why this society gives no right to make my living. Who are they to deny for everything?
I just can't do a job without purpose. I also tried, but it didn't work for me. The job I have done just made me hated about my life itself. First was a corrupt company, and next one was made me even hate to the subject itself that I study.

I don't know how long I will stay alive, tried or thought about suicide many times now, but the human body is made in such a way that, it doesn't even allow it.
I know I will die by starving or by disease, not by suicide.

How're you currently feeling?