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Are these symptoms of depression?

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Are these symptoms of depression?

Postby ilithios » Fri Dec 16, 2016 7:30 pm

I think i am depressed for the last 6 and half years.Recently i went to 2 psychologists and 2 psychiatrists, 1 of the psychiatrists(he used a standard depression questionnaire that i filled up to diagnose me) and psychologist(said that i have) diagnosed me with depression and the others said that i have GAD and social anxiety instead.
I am 22 years old(who graduated from uni last year) and for most of my life have been feeling lonely.I have been bullied in school since the last year of lyceum i frequently struggle with my parents(although the last year my fights with my parents increased drastically.Every other day to be more exact ).

At the beginning of 2016 i desperately tried to open contact with every acquaintance i ever had but all attempts failed dramatically without being given reasons by any of them. After every rejection i slightly tremble while moving for a few days and when i lie in bed my head and limbs are sometimes jerking.
I haven't lost all of the interest and joy in my activities but the joy i feel when i do them has become much more superficial.
My ideas have become a lot more repetitive and i have trouble making the more complicated thoughts that i did before and have some trouble forming sentences.During the morning hours 2-3 days a week i shave e nightmares which wake me up sometimes with numb hands (i suspect these are due to repressed anger-despair or something).
Finally around 15 times a day i remember some of my rejections and i get so angry as to flail my hands agitated and walk rapidly for a minute or two.
While i don't feel as stressed as i used to be in social situations i have become a lot more mute.
What do you think i have.Do you have any similar experiences?
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Re: Are these symptoms of depression?

Postby naps » Tue Dec 20, 2016 12:56 pm

Have you told any of the doctors about these symptoms? They sound more like anxiety than depression to me. For example:

ilithios wrote:At the beginning of 2016 i desperately tried to open contact with every acquaintance i ever had but all attempts failed dramatically without being given reasons by any of them.


People tend to withdraw rather than reach out during depression. The other symptoms sound like they could be from anxiety, but it's never a bad idea to see a regular doctor to rule out the possibility of any physiological problems.
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Re: Are these symptoms of depression?

Postby ilithios » Tue Dec 20, 2016 1:30 pm

I was socially withdrawn the previous years due to fear of social rejection.I just thought that my social isolation was the partly responsible for my depression and that i was well enough at that moment that i could withstand systematic rejection which as it turned out wasn't the case.
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Re: Are these symptoms of depression?

Postby naps » Tue Dec 20, 2016 1:41 pm

ilithios wrote:I was socially withdrawn the previous years due to fear of social rejection.I just thought that my social isolation was the partly responsible for my depression and that i was well enough at that moment that i could withstand systematic rejection which as it turned out wasn't the case.


Fear of social rejection is based in anxiety. Have you looked at the Avoidant Personality Disorder forum? I'm not saying you have AvPD, but you might find some conversations there that relate to being socially withdrawn due to fear of rejection. Maybe these could help you better understand?
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Re: Are these symptoms of depression?

Postby ilithios » Thu Dec 22, 2016 11:46 am

Beside from fear of rejection i feel despair, uncontrollable anger and dysphoria for most of the day as well.
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