Could this be some form of depression?

Hey, I'm new here and I apologize in advance if my English is not perfect (it's not my mother tongue). I believe, that an external opinion or advice could be helpful in my current situation. I'm an asexual and I live alone, but actually never get lonely and I'm very comfortable with my lifestyle. I would also say, that in general I'm a happy person. But I experience the same problem almost on a regular basis: I can't sleep well on Sundays and I generally feel depressed and sometimes even desperate on those days (especially on Sunday evenings). I believe it might have something to do with my job, which is sometimes stressful and demanding. Like I said, I only have this problem on Sundays or on the last day of the vacation, when I know that I have to go to work on the next day. But I'm not sure if it could also be another issue: perhaps I'm lonely without fully realizing it (?), I don't know. The strange thing is that when the next day comes (Monday), I always feel alright again and I always forget about the anxiety from the last evening. I'm 31 years old, male, I'm asexual and I have been living alone for years (like I said, I'm also very comfortable about it and I never feel motivated to look for a partner). What do you make of this? Could this be some form of depression or is it more like work-related stress? Thank you in advance for your opinions and advice.

Hello,

we're not professionals and can't diagnose you here.

Personally I think it might be related to your job. Perhaps you just like your work very very much, even though there's stress, and being at home isn't as nice? Is that possible? I used to love my job very much and actually looked forward to jumping out of bed on Monday. I felt very alone during weekends until I made some friends (I'm an expat).

Hello and thank you for your answer! I'm not sure if I love my job very much, but I believe that it's an important part of my life that makes it more meaningful. The funny thing is that I succumb to a (mild) depression only on the day directly before the start of the work week and never on the days before that, even if I've had a long weekend or vacation. Recently, I've thought that there might actually be a different reason for it: when I stay on my own for awhile (and this could be as little as a couple of days) and don't communicate much with others, I sort of get unsure and insecure. Then, when I know that I have a full work week ahead of me, I'm (on a subconscious level) not very sure if I can cope with all the things that await me at work. Perhaps that's what's making me temporarily depressed. Then, on the next day (Monday) I go to work and I see that I can cope and do everything as expected, so I'm feeling good again. It's probably the rapid transition that I'm not handling so well: staying at home on the weekend in a very calm and relaxed atmosphere on my own and then suddenly switching to the relatively stressful work on Monday. Have you experienced anything similar to this?

Years ago, like say, 7years ago, I was working a job which was very stressful. Sales. I had to sell, sell, sell. I had my boss on me. It felt like I had to lie to customers just to trick them into buying. I had depression and on top of that I had anxiety. Do you have anxiety? My weeks went something like how you describe. Eventually I couldn't work anymore because I had so much depression and anxiety I couldn't sleep and I couldn't function like I needed to. I was a nervous wreck. Like Oliveira said, we can't diagnose and we aren't professionals either, but I recommend seeing a doctor if it's bothering you so much in your daily life. With me and my past experience, I did see a doctor and started taking medication.

Quietgirl,
thank you for your reply! Did you try changing your job, when you had so much stress and anxiety related to it? I have thought recently, that the right solution for me would be to change my job, so that I could still use my qualifications appropriately, but work in a less stressful environment. On the other hand, there are many positive aspects related to my current job, since I have learned quite a lot here and am a part of a very friendly team (I'm friends with most of my colleagues). So it isn't black and white for me, but I think that I've almost reached the point, where I don't benefit that much from my current job any more: I've learned there almost everything that I could, I am approaching "the plateau" in my learning/professional development curve and the stress isn't decreasing at all.

shatobrian,
I ended up quitting the job and my husband said I could just stay at home with the kids. They were little at the time. It saved in child care. I did eventually get much better.

I hope things work out for you, whether you stay there or go to a different job. Let us know how it goes and how your mood improves.