Need help in finding what disorder I have

Hello



I have been searching the web for the name of the mental disorder I have. I am probably using the wrong words for the symptoms I have am searching for in google, I was wondering if anyone here knows what I might have so I can look for help easier.



I have depression of some sort which I assume this ties into. My main problem is that I don't feel anything from life, I don't get anything out of my senses. It feels like I am viewing the world through a tunnel or something. My brain just sits there dull and lifeless and everything I see, hear, taste, smell, feel travels to my brain and gets lost on the way. When I go to the beach I want to be all "This is the beach it is lovely!" but instead I only really feel probably 20% of the stimulation a normal person would feel. It is like if you were watching a movie you didn't care for and only paid attention to it now and then. It means I have trouble making decisions too, for a small example if I was going to order food from a menu I assume most people's brains tell them what they want, I don't feel anything, I am neutral to all choices so it makes them hard to make.



The biggest issue is that since I don't feel anything I don't want to do anything and I don't get anything out of life. I do what I have to, I go to work, I eat, and when I have spare time I play games for escapism. But I never feel the need to smile or the desire to do something or see something. I have been this way my entire life and I know it ties into depression but it must be its own medical condition as well. And if it is then I can maybe find help somehow. And I mean find help by internet doctering, I am fed up with the health industry. Being a male today in a world that hates men is difficult and many men are alone and isolated, me included. Perhaps if I can get some feeling then I can figure out what i am and what I should do on a daily basis.



thanks.

This does sound like the sort of depression I experienced over a decade ago and I had a firm belief it couldn't be resolved. I finally went to a psychiatrist and was put on antidepressant. The first one didn't work, the second did. My life went back to normal. I had no problem taking pills. It's an illness like any other. I was glad that I could feel again.

Greetings!

I have been on maybes about 5 or 6 different pills over the last decade and a half, have not found my perfect drug yet

What helped me, which unfortunately is not to say it will help you, was an unusual med, a MAOI called moclobemide. It's not legal in all countries from what I know, but perhaps if you haven't tried a MAOI yet it could be the right thing to discuss with your psychiatrist?

Indeed I have never tried that before, I will ask my doctor about it when I go for repeats thankyou

I hope you will get better. This sounds really sad..

Thanks stevens, I have been fighting this for so long I don't expect it will.