New here, My history, please help. (18years)

Hi, I'm 18 and feel totally lost, if depression is not what I have, I would ask that ayudarais me, this is my story:
Even my 15 years and have always been so happy and loving life, which has not happened in me that I gradually falling into a depression in my 16, I thought I had Alzheimer's because I could not think and could only mourn mourn for 1 month, received psychiatric care and had a partial response to antidepressants, but came back to fall into another depression desperate months later, which came back out with the help of drugs also partially returned my will to live, but .. . worries me too my current state, do not know if this is normal, if someone feels like me ...

I feel impersonal, soulless, empty, like a zombie with no emotion or desire for anything, no desire to talk or be with anyone, I do not want leisure time, I just want to be locked in my house, I speak very little (is this normal?), not be happening to me but I have become a hermit be lifeless ... what happens is that I'm not sad and do not cry, just when I think deeply in my situation and my powerlessness over it.

I do not want social contact with anyone, I'm not able to have it if I wanted, or I try, I'm like the living dead, I spend the whole day looking for information on the internet thinking what might have happened

What do you think? advice? opinions? is this normal?
Either one else is welcome.

PD. sorry for the language, it's not my native language.

I think the feelings you are having are symptoms that could fit with some kind of a depression. Apathy, anhedonia,sadness without crying it would be common to see with a depression. And many people who are depressed withdraw from their social life.

You got some psychiatric cae I read, antidepressants which helped to some degree, but not anymore?
Maybe you could use some more help in the form of therapy, but I don't know if that's available to you.

And, what you are going through can't really be described as "normal" I think so.. And alot of people with mental illnes can relate I think. If it's an option I'd look into some good therapy like cognitive behavioural therapy. You are still young and dealing with it now may help you recover soon enough to not let this have too big of an impact on your life.

Yokker wrote:I think the feelings you are having are symptoms that could fit with some kind of a depression. Apathy, anhedonia,sadness without crying it would be common to see with a depression. And many people who are depressed withdraw from their social life.

You got some psychiatric cae I read, antidepressants which helped to some degree, but not anymore?
Maybe you could use some more help in the form of therapy, but I don't know if that's available to you.

And, what you are going through can't really be described as "normal" I think so.. And alot of people with mental illnes can relate I think. If it's an option I'd look into some good therapy like cognitive behavioural therapy. You are still young and dealing with it now may help you recover soon enough to not let this have too big of an impact on your life.

thanks for the reply, my post in the forum has been in a moment of despair with the intention of vent, was having an anxiety attack and crying I just settle with some clonazepam, I hope all this someday have some sense and you can be happy again .. the feeling of despair, emptiness and a feeling that I describe as 'claustrophobic' on myself, impotence .. guess will somehow melancholic depression symptoms or something, hopefully not something more serious, that's severe enough, it is unfair that people have to go through now .. so if anyone feels just hope that contact, thanks.

Please I need opinions

Hello,

nobody here can diagnose you. We are not professionals. We don't know you well enough. But I can see that your mental/emotional state causes you problems, and that is enough to suggest you speak to a professional -- psychiatrist or psychologist at least. Only that way can you expect to be evaluated properly.

I am about to switch hospitals, and I have been called today for an intake appointment and warned it will take 3.5 hours of questioning and testing. This is one of the reasons we can't be of much help. If I may suggest, read other people's posts and see if you can relate to them. Hopefully you can find help you need, here and/or in real life.

Big hugs, and I hope you feel better soon!