Another person

Hello. Just another person posting here I guess. Having a hard time, i guess like everyone else. I don't really have anyone to talk to so i'm just going to write what i'm feeling right now. Maybe my life story even. I'll put it in some neat little brackets so it doesn't take up too much room when i do.


I'm a very sensitive person. I looked up something online that said there's people who are highly sensitive, so I just kind of assumed I had that. When i look for answers to my problems though, I find i had something in common with everything.
I suppose my search for answers just kind of left me in the same place i was before i started.
I went to a counselor once, but it didnt help. I stopped going because I cant afford a counselor anymore.
Its funny how much effort and money it takes to feel better.
I also have a really hard time taking my mind off the big picture. A lot of times my mind always thinks about the vast universe, the massive time difference between stars, and the world. all the pain and struggling and all the violence and good and bad the world has to offer. I always feel like my head is bulging from thinking so much about everything.

I also don't really talk to anyone either. Well, there's my imaginary friend who Ive been friends with since I was little, but we kind of share the same mind ya know. Its kind of hard to find different things to talk about. She seems to mainly be there for emotional support.

But yea, I'm just another depressed individual in this forums. I could say I'm at my wits end here, but who hasn't said that? I could say i have contemplated suicide but who hasn't? My problems are not that bad. I'm not that important. I'm just another human. Wow, if you think about it that way it really is depressing, isn't it? To be honest I don't really care if anyone responds to this post or if anyone even really reads this.

I think I'm just doing this for myself mainly. Of course, I could be writing this as a quiet plead for help, but I've done that so many times before. One more time isn't really going to matter.

hello everyone. My imaginary friend also says hi. Hows life?

Yeah, counseling didn't help me either. Well, at first it did because I didn't even know what was wrong with me, and counseling clarified the problem. Unfortunately, the problem is that I was just born this way and have always been this way and talking about it doesn't help me. It runs in my family, documented back to my great-grandfather.

Are you seeing a medical doctor about it? If you've been like this all your life like I have, medication may be the only thing that helps.

I cant afford to see a doctor. I don't have a job or health insurance. Its really a struggle because my mother can only take so much of me before she kicks me out. All my life she tells me to stop feeling sorry for myself and go out and get a job. I don't have much support at home so finding a doctor is really a struggle. Last time I took some anti-depressants it made me very suicidal, making my whole family skeptical about the effects of anti-depressants.

I have a very slim chance of getting on medication.