am i depressed?

Hi all i wasn't sure whether to put this in the paranoia forum or this one but anyway

Last Tuesday and Wednesday, I had the worst time of my life and i have no idea where it came from, I was amazingly suicidal, I have 2 friends who i will do anything for and up until then vice versa, i haven't pushed them away as much as i feared but the connection doesn't feel as close anymore.... I have been great since Wednesday because one of my friends left me a message that kind of shook me out of what i was feeling, i had annoyed them quite alot by that point, and i am still not quite sure where we stand but it will hurt alot more if i have sabotaged the relationship....

as i say i have been great since Wednesday, but today one of my friends came on MSN, and on a forum i am a member of, and went to busy on MSN but still posted on the forum, I began to get paranoid that maybe i had done or said something that had annoyed her, she went offline without changing from Busy on MSN, I kno that she has something big on tomorrow, and i kno she will b busy preparing for that but still didn't stop me getting paranoid lol

recently neither of them have texted me as much as they did before my little episode but both have kids that are now off school for the summer holidays so i understand that

also yesterday i was chatting to her on MSN and as she was about to leave i said thankyou for remaining my friend and she said Hey..What did we say? Friends Stick together

i am not sure if it was Depression i went thru but i have read it can last for short times rite?

any help regarding this or the paranoia i feel every now and then will b greatly appreciated

Heya,


When I first became depressed paranoia was all too apparent and pessimism was also involved - These two go hand-in-hand. Your friends are most likely not ignoring you and it is just you fearing the worst. You must stop thinking this way or they might not enjoy your company anymore. Rekindle some old, happier, habits into your life if you can remember what they were.


Bad periods occur in everybody's life and, as you said, these periods can last a "short time[s]". Ironically, you must enlist your friends for support. However, instead of showing your fear/paranoia of losing them, just go out with them as normal. Enjoy their company and do what you did before when you were once happy.


Kevin.

Thankyou but the friends i want to go out with are not willing to see me at the mo,

I think it is more stress at the mo tbh

I was in town today talking to one of my mates and he made a joke about me, and i said,
"how about i put ur head thru this table?" i meant it as a joke but, i started hopping from one foot to the other i need some stress relief

that is not me i am normally happy and go lucky

Well, you mentioned that your friends are all busy right now, didn't you? Perhaps that is just what is happening here. People's lives change and, indeed, relationships with people change over time -
We must not expect them to forever remain the same.


So, from now on there might be less time to be with your friends due to their own commitments but you can still enjoy the relationship you have with them. You just have to accept that times have changed.


Kevin.

yes i kno they are busy i have accepted that rite now my problem is stress

I'm stressed these past two days too. I continually almost 'snap' - I'm sure you know the feeling.