I feel depressed after I reach my goals

Hi, I am a 35 year old accountant. I have a constant need to set goals for myself, in business and private life. When I reach my goals I feel tired and restless and often sad. I feels like I have to have something to work towards to keep my going in life.

Any advice for me?

Hi NeedSomeAdvice
i grew up in the states, and i feel that the culture/society is very much oriented in that mentality.
i do believe that we have to have goals, but not in a consumeristic way, i am sorry if that word does not exist. what i mean, is that lots of things today are wash and wear....and we run the risico to be like that.
i am constantly fighting with myself because of this. i grew up thinking like that, but now in my 50's that my health declines, i need to re-make what is esential for me.
to be productive, or to be. to make things, or to be more grounded in who i am.

i think this in an existential question, matter. i believe, and this brings me back to my essentials,
to the life that i want to have although the ingredients of the formula keep on changing.

i hope it helps to make the right question in order to seek the answer that will make you whole.

Always or just recently?

I agree, living in the US there is a LOT of pressure to always have goals. It's silly.

Tauran wrote:Always or just recently?

I agree, living in the US there is a LOT of pressure to always have goals. It's silly.

Hi Tauran, sorry for the late reaction. funny but the reason i have not written has to do with your question. christmas and new year also bring expectations, and this drains me before i get started.

your question, always or just recently? i do not know, i grew up in a very competitive family, best grades, best behavior was literally rewarded, i got all the gifts!! i have been always very extremely goal oriented until i became a mother, because your goal exist but they are so different, so simple yet remain a challenge to achieve them.

in the US was very present, but it is everywhere. It is very difficult to change that frame of mind, to change the pace. i want to do it, and i need to, my health is not getting better because my mind also is always "on the run".
i saw something by Tolstoi, de russian writer and i loved it. i keep on looking for things that will bring light or ideas, and i research, read, swim in them, i keep on looking.

in the ignacian spirituality is called discernment, see what consoles you in a wholesome way,
and nurture it. see what brings you desolation (like this goal angst) and try to change it...sometimes i think, that it is not so much getting there, but the path we make within that process.
keep on looking!! (despite the possible mental issues that you, i, we might have).

Accounting and business goals are seldom spiritually rewarding. If I were you I'd go out on a country retreat and reconnect with people on a community level, without any goals. That will probably give you the sense of accomplishment you are trying to find.

I feel sad when I get positive reinforcement. It is like I can't process. I think my brain has been burned up inside due to everything I have been through. I don't have any advice. I just feel your pain.

Tauran wrote:Always or just recently?

I agree, living in the US there is a LOT of pressure to always have goals. It's silly.

sorry Tauran, i just realized that this question was not for me.

-- Fri Jan 10, 2014 6:04 am --

peaceismyrushmore wrote:I feel sad when I get positive reinforcement. It is like I can't process. I think my brain has been burned up inside due to everything I have been through. I don't have any advice. I just feel your pain.

hi peaceismyrushmore,
what you said stroke me. You put it into words very good. thank you.
In my case this is not the only factor, but i have to accept that it is present.