Nearing my endpoint- again.

I don't know what to do anymore. I'm always lonley, always sad, always hurting. I always feel like no one likes me, or wants me around. I know that my family would have more money if it weren't for me; braces, therapy, psychiatry, doctor's, etc etc.
I don't know what to do anymore. I just found out I didn't make it into a singing competition, and that was my back-up plan. I can't write. I can't draw. I lost every ability that I used to have.
I'm a minor, but in my late teens. I'm almost at the point where I have to go out on my own and get a job and a house and I just can't. I don't want to live, there's no way I'd ever be able to live on my own.

I've been in a mental-hospital, I've tried so many different kinds of medications for anxiety and depression, I'm in therapy and my family and friends have all done their best to show me how much they care about me. Nothing helps.
I just really don't want to live anymore. Nothing anyone says helps, talking doesn't help, meds don't help, the hospital didn't help. Nothing will, and I've been this way since I was really, really small.
I remember my mom telling me once, that we were going to Six Flags. I was maybe 7 or 8, maybe younger, but I remember everyone getting so excited and jumping around and everything. I didn't care, at all. I pretended to care so she wouldn't think something was wrong.
I just never care. I never find joy in anything. I don't know what to do anymore.