by JER06 » Thu Feb 16, 2006 4:52 am
For the first time in my life, I have decided to get help for mood , anxiety and depression problems. This was about 10 months ago. My primary care doc was no help except to give me zoloft untill that didn't work. Then he gave me paxilcr and like 10 .5 ativan. Wow a whole 5 mg of ativan. Anyways so I find a counciling center to go to and they sucked. All the psychiatrist did is up my paxil cr and say I dont need any benzos or anything to help me sleep. He also said if I quit smoking It would help my depression. So obviously I found a new psychitrist at the hospital. Well I saw him 3 times and for the next 3 weeks he is going to be helping out someplace else and then on vacation for 3 weeks. He kept me on the paxil cr 50 mg and switched me to klonopin .05 twice a day or as needed. I feel th ssri just mask my emotions. I still feel the same! I still get thoughts about suicide or dying. I feel that no psychiatrist can help me. Maybe I need to keep searching, but Im sick of going over the same story every time you meet a new shrink. My psychiatrist doesn't do anything to help. He ask how I have been feeling. Says he wants to keep me on the same meds. I say ssri scare me a little and he assures me there safe even though paxil has the worst withdrawl symptoms. I ask him today if I could get either 3 .05 klonopin a day as needed or 2, 1mg k-pins a day as needed. Of course he says no because they are addicting. What isn't addicting in this world , pills,tv,sex,money,food,shopping. Anyways sorry to ramble ,but I just want to get back on my feet and live life. Is there no answer for my pain? There was no cause, so maybe no answer? The only thing paxil does is makes me more liveable with at home , less xteme and hides my emotions. Should I continue to take it? I dont want to die yet , but I don't want to live either. GOD BLESS