Please someone help....

Thanks. Well it started with bad anxiety for which i took sertraline 50mg which did help but gave me depersonalisation. was on it for 5/6months ish. Then got ill at xmas with swine flu and got depression psychiatrist prescribed increased dose of sertraline 75mg. made me even more depressed then went to gp and swapped onto citalopram for the depression, made my depersonalisation much worse, stopped everything got discontinuation syndrome -(electric shocks in head). Then got very very depressed started self harming, got prozac 20mg from another pyschiatrist i went to see. Made me a bit less depressed but sent me high after a week, (depersonalisation still there) came down to 10mg of prozac and was still having high episodes. Came off everything had weeks of mood fluctuation high low high low high low basically with an occasional normal bit. Then stopped fluctuating and went really depressed. Tried a bit of mirtazapine extreemely low dose. from another psychiatrist when i was still at home) it made me feel liek killing people so took me off it. Went as an inpatient to an adolescent unit was severely depressed they did nothing. weeks/months (not sure) Came back home. then weeks/months Went back there.Severely depressed still ended up going on mirtazapine again 7.5mg made me more depressed, then 15mg made me have highs and lows again and made me suicidal. came off it. Felt very very depressed. Then anxiety was very bad, out of body experiences started happening body parts feeling detached from me. Depersonalisation in general alot worse. Since then my depression has been bad and my anxiety has been extremely bad over the last few days dont know if its related to this - (I went to see someone i used to know, my old singing teacher and i was soo panicky and after that this chronic weird not recognising thing started worse again and being out of my body) and i feel like i dont recognise my mum or brother fully and i just dont know what to do. Am going to see another psychiatrist and do you think i should just explain the whole situation? Im so frightened and i cant take this anymore, dont want to go back to the unit as you sit there doing nothing the whole day basically locked in the unit which makes u feel worse and the 'support staff' dont understand and you have to wait literally weeks for the doctors to come and see you. Have made some friends in the unit and that helps but honestly when i was on mirtazapine i was close to suicide and nearly slit my wrists and tried jumping out of a car etc, and im still considering doing it becus this is so unbearable and i cant stand the depersonalisation and not recognising my mum and brother. Theres the story i know you cant say what is wrong with me but no psychiatrist seems to know. I occasionally hear voices in my head not through my ears or anything. thats basically all of it from start to finish.
I feel so out of my body, almost like im two people as i dont recognise my reflection and voice and then think how can i be that person if i dont recognise them. Im scared and someone please help?1 :'(

Anyone help?!

Hi there.
Sorry to hear u are having such a bad time. Yes, you should tell the new psychiatirst everything. Leaving stuff out makes it harder for him/her to help you. What age are you--you mention child/adolescent unit--so you must be under 18. The reason I ask is that younger people can often react badly to certain meds and also may need lower doses.
I have depersonalisation disorder (DP for short) from age 22 to 36 (present day). tSome of he symptoms you describe do sound like DP--feeling unreal, other people looking different (that could be derealisation--often comes hand in hand with DP ). However hearing voices is not a DP symptom, and suggests you may have more than one condition. What do the voices say-- is it mainly one voice telling you to harm yourself/that you are bad/worthless/useless/ugly etc etc ??
It is quite common for people prone to anxiety to feel worse--more anxious/agitated and due to this, even suicidal when first started on an antidepressant--therefore it is often a good idea to start a short --eg 1 week course of a benzodiazepine like diazepam , at the same time as the antidepressant. But antideps are used medium/longer term, and drugs like diazepam should not be used for more than 1-2 weeks as they are addictive.
I am a doctor myself so can give you more advise, but ideally you need to see your new psychiatrist, as giving advise over the internet is never as good as seeing a doctor in person.
S

Hi I would print off your opening post and show it to the new psych. If you keep having these reactions to antidepressants then maybe they are not the right sort of medication for you. X