Having difficulty describing a certain feeling..help please

You are good, Canolime! I will look up those dream posts, thank you.

I haven't tried talking to him. It seems like it happens quickly, so I don't know if I would have time to. Then again, I have no idea what would even happen if I did. Maybe its best to let "him" make the first move?

I think Rogueguitar is the one who mentioned it. Maybe you could ask her (Ashley) about it.

I don't think you should wait. They might be waiting for you to talk to them, if they haven't initiated it by now. Can you look inside right now, and see if you can see anyone? Even if you can't, like I said, you can just yell out a hello, introduce yourself, and ask them to tell you about themselves.

Just checked out her posts- seems very similar. I think I know what you mean about looking inside. I get very angry feelings shot at me when I do. Like strong thoughts- not my feelings (make sense at all?). I feel like there are a lot of things shuffling around. I used to have non-stop intrusive thoughts (comments and images thrown at me). My doc thought I had schizophrenia, but that was completely ruled out. I've been noticing they have been coming back again. No symptoms of the bipolar, just the thoughts. Any correlation/similar experiences?

Yeah, that makes sense. Alters can send images and feelings to others.

If you start talking with whoever is there, the intrusive thoughts and images might stop, or at least lessen. Maybe they're mad, and are trying to get your attention.

I'll do my best- that all makes sense, thanks. Is this something my psychiatrist could help with? How much control do I have with all this? I feel like I've been suppressing lots of things, but maybe that really isn't control is it.

You'll probably need to find a psychologist who specializes in dissociative disorders, because you need someone who knows how to deal with multiples. And a lot of psychs don't believe in DID, so finding one who specializes in it, will be a lot easier.

walden wrote:How much control do I have with all this?

Well, what do you mean by control? You do have some control, but in order for this to work well, you'll have to share some of it with the alters Clarify what you mean by control, and I'll try to answer.

walden wrote:I feel like I've been suppressing lots of things, but maybe that really isn't control is it.

No, that's not really control. It's probably making things worse.

Control to me is trying to ignore it I guess. There are lots of little black outs I am realizing now. I called my mom and had a convo I don't remember not too long ago. And I have a few friends that say- "hey, remember when you said.." or "remember when you did..." I always figured they were making it up, but 3 different people with lots of events like that? I think there's something there

Well, that kind of control will make things worse.

walden wrote:I always figured they were making it up, but 3 different people with lots of events like that? I think there's something there

Yeah If you want to stop the blackouts, you need to talk and work with your alters, because it will make you more co-conscious with each other.

I will try. I don't think I have had any blackouts longer than a few minutes. Is that how it starts? And those intrusive thoughts that are phrases coming in are getting more frequent. For example "It's all about the disconnect" and "I want clothes on" (that was in the shower)..

DID starts during childhood. If you're not co-conscious, the switches cause blackouts. The switches start in the first place because the child is in danger (at least mentally)... another personality comes out, to protect the "main" from whatever is going on. So really, the black outs should have always been there, because that's how you were protected. You're probably just noticing them more now. The switches can get worse when a multiple grows up, because the mind splits when a child is stuck in a traumatic situation... once you're older, you're usually out of a lot of the danger and can handle things better than you could when you were little. Less danger and being able to handle it better mean alters can relax a little, and don't have to hide as much. So that could make the switches increase and become easier to notice.

Does that make sense? I'm having trouble concentrating today...

As for the phrases, you might want to talk to them about that