Dillusional Boyfriend?

Can someone please describe some more symptomatic situations of Delusional Disorder so I can really see if this is the behavior I am seeing?

This condition is very new to me. I have been seeing a wonderful man for a little over 2 months. I have known him briefly for about 10 years. The relationship has been great. Last night and for the fourth time, he became frustrated and accussed me of taking something out on him, and other things as well. Each time it is a different situation, but is always my fault or something I have supposedly done. At first, I was careful to look at my own behavior, but it was very clear last night that something is definately wrong with his thoughts. I thought it might be Schizophrenia, but I stumbled across this "Delusional Disorder" information, and believe this is very close to the situations I have been seeing with him. What freaks me out is watching and listening to him while the situation he is describing begins to unfold. It scares the crap out of me now, and I am so sad because he's so different than any man I have ever been with. We've just been having a great time. I also believe that he is sabotaging the relationship by doing this as he is probably a little down on himself and has been alone for awhile and maybe he enjoys his life this way?

Thanks.

Heya,

Without more evidence it's difficult to say if he has Delusional Disorder or not ... I think that one must look at his background in order to understand why he is blaming you for 'everything'. A possible explanation is that he grew up having 'everything' done for him. When anything went wrong, he could point blame and rely on someone (possibly mother) to fix it for him. Do you know if this is the case...? Ultimately, I'm implying that he was spoilt as a child and learned that he could point blame and criticise and get away with it.

Another possible explanation is that, ironically, he was abandoned previously in his life and has suffered some form of mental stress as a result. Thus, when anything goes wrong in the present - even a little thing - it can be interpretted by him as something major. It can, in fact, seem to him as if he is going to loose you and this feelign is dealt with in entirely the wrong way: Instead of trying to make it better, he just throws in the towel and starts berrating/criticising you to no end...

You've done good to bear the brunt of this so far, but you are not obliged in any sense of the word to continue to do so... Don't put up with it. The next time that he does this, walk away and do'nt bother going back when he calls you or shouts your name. See him as a child who needs to learn respect.

Kevin

Thanks for your help.

hi LAW. you can recognize delusional disorder if he starts accusing you (or others) of things you (or others) have never done, and he won't accept any explanation that challenges his conclusion. from what you wrote above, it sounds like he's very angry, and people accuse people of things, but that in itself isn't proof of DD. nonetheless it doesn't sound good.

Chucky wrote:you are not obliged in any sense of the word to continue to do so... Don't put up with it.

i agree totally with chucky here, but this takes resolve. it was decades before i could re-arrange my relationship with the DDP person i have to deal with: i kept looking for ways to "get through", and had to admit to myself eventually that i was never going to get through. don't let that happen to you!

on the other hand...

Chucky wrote:See him as a child who needs to learn respect.

1: that's pretty patronizing
2: if you do come to 'see him as a child' i'd wonder why you'd want to be in a relationship with him. adults need adults.

in either case, good luck!