I became psychotic. I started believing I was going to save the world, and I was psychic and this friend of mine was going to fall in love with me. I was convinced she was my soulmate. Arrogant, no? Problem. Two weeks earlier she proposed to her fiancee. I felt like I kept seeing signs that she was in love with me. She clipped her toenails because I complained they were long and I was convinced that really meant something.
Giving me special looks, hinting she was going to fall for me. I had serious erotomanic delusions. I told a mutual friend all of the signs I was seeing. So I was convinced I was seeing all these signs and broke up with my girlfriend. I had liked this friend for probably 7 years. The night I broke up with my girlfriend, I went to her house. I was delusional and thought if I was there when my girlfriend got home from work, I was going to literally die.
Anyways, that night an affair started. I was convinced it was destined to be. I told her I knew she was in love with me and she was my soulmate etc etc. I told her I was a psychic and it was our destiny to be together. At first, I believe it was just an ego boost for her.
She was telling everyone the affair was in my head as a cover up for having an affair with me... It wasn't until someone caught us kissing that she fessed up. She eventually fell really hard for me. My own erotomania somehow presented the conditions for her her actually fall for me.
I just find that hilarious and such a great self fulfilling prophecy.Anyway, since I thought I was psychic and she was my soulmate it presented pretty poor conditions for realizing I was delusional. I even spoke to a psychiatrist and he said I was fine. Since I thought I was psychic, predicted her falling for me I thought my other delusions were also real.
I eventually ended things when I realized what I was doing was wrong. I told her fiancee about the affair for the third time. A month or two ago, I dropped off a letter to my "soulmate" apologizing for exposing the affair. After I dropped off the letter, I checked her instagram and she put a bunch of "inside jokes" in the comments and even uploaded a video of our song. I thought maybe she wanted to tell me she forgave me.
The unfortunate part was that I asked her why she did this and did not respond. She blocked me and I'm sure she's telling her fiancee that I'm seeing "signs" again.
Hurts to have my credibility insulted like that. It seems vindictive of her. Not only did she cover the affair for a while telling everyone it's all in my head, now she's putting in legitimate messages that only I would understand. It's frustrating, but I wanted to share my story. Briefly psychotic women whose delusions became self-fulfilling.This was what I told my "soulmate's" fiancee before she fell for me. Understandably, when she started falling for me it cemented my delusions pretty securely:
rachel, it's ashley. i need to talk to you. this is very important, i know you must have so much hurt inside
i need to talk to you and explain and i am unfortunately going to cause a car crash in your relationship
i'm talking to you as a soul that sees you have a kind soul
you are going to go through some very hard times ahead
and i'm sorry to do this to you both
i never wanted to hurt your relationship because i know how sweet you are
when i look in your eyes i see myself
i have ripped her walls right open at the most important part of your relationship
everything has to be this way and everything had to be this way
i was meant to be the test in your relationship
i will bring a lot of pain into your life and you may never understand why
but it's my destiny and yours and hers
goodbye and i hope you stay strong , okay?
but you need to be prepared for what is coming
and you will grow
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