I feel like I'm dead or my mind has been takin over.

I've been struggling with reality on and off for months now with medication changes with therapy. This episode comes and goes. I wake up feeling angry, guilty,confused and tired because I'm also living another life in my dreams. I struggle everyone morning with the thought that I am dead and my world I live in is the in between afterlife. I believe another demon has taken over my body and I'm doing horrible things. I have been in the ER about 5 times in the last couple months because I have been feeling so sick that I believe I'm going out finally or I'm just waiting to hear I have something terribly wrong with me. To just find out nothing is wrong even though I feel it. Only a few things make me feel real. I want to wake up! I can't keep suffering anymore. Anyone else feel this way?

I have tactile hallucinations and often feel very tired and angry. I don't have dreams but I feel isolated from the rest of society. As a consequence I desperately seek out ways to re-connect with normality, and for me, the only thing that does it is drink. It is the only thing that seems real enough and it works. My tactile hallucinations are horrendous. I have managed to keep out of hospital so far, in the vain hope that this would all go away. But it has been a year now and it hasn't. I have suffered terribly over the years, and like you, I am thoroughly tired of it. I deserve some happiness, but I know I won't get it.

Best wishes,
Padster

I'm sorry you both aren't feeling well. I wish you both the light from hope to guide you in your dark moments. For me, delusional hope was a powerful form of magical thinking that helped when the meds hadn't yet kicked in. If you can focus on love and powerful positive emotions, maybe that will help while the doctors figure out what is wrong. Also, I found writing helped to ground me. I wrote my way through the psychosis. I mean, my journals of delusions aren't exactly coherent, but it was helpful, to me. Hope that helps.

Sunny