I lie to my wife

Im having a hard time with lying to my wife. We have been married for 8 years and I have lied to her on and off since day one. The thing is, I lie, she finds out, I apologize, and she doesnt trust me. I lie about dumb things. We have a slightly open relationship, but I still lie about things. I text message alot, and sometimes I text women that she doesnt know and she finds out about it. I lie and say that the number is someones it isnt, and she finds out. Now, I am not having any physical relationships with any of these women, and I do not "want" them in anyway, but I still lie about them which makes my wife even more suspicious of BAD things going on. I just want to stop lying about these small insignificant things, so she doesnt think I am lying about BIGGER issues...HOW do I do that? I do I stop my first impulse of lying to her when I know its wrong and I know she is going to find out the truth anyway? I am sick of hurting her, and myself over such small things...any ideas???

Hi,

You have already gone down a wrong path here, but the longer you spend on this path, the worse the situation will become. Plus, there will never be an easy way out of it if you want to maintain a good relationship with your life. Therefore, just stop everything now, confess to her, and promise to get professional help if she & you think that it would be beneficial.

Take care,
Kevin

Do you ever think, even for a second, about those women you are texting, and whether it is such a " small and insignificant" thing for them ? Perhaps it is hurting them, when you turn them on, and then just disappear? I know it didn't even cross your mind, because you are simply a selfish person who doesn't respect either those women or his wife, and, after all, you don't respect yourself.

The first step in your healing process would be to face the problem, and to see things as they truly are, because what you described as " insignificant" may be very significant from someone else's point of view.