14yr old lying

Hello everyone! I have been reading through all the posts and am so glad I found this board! My 14yr old son has ADHD as well as anxiety, I believe he is also a compulsive liar. While reading everyone's stories and links especially living with a lying addict all I could think was this is what my house is like!

My son has been lying since pre-k, telling his teachers his father and I moved but left him there, his uncle is who takes care of him, we feed him worms for dinner, stories like that. His teacher knew us and thought he was imaginative. As he has gotten older the lies are more and more. When he is busted in a lie (which is common as they are so outlandish sometimes) he gets defensive, lies more even when we have solid proof, never admits to it and makes me feel like I am the crazy one. My husband and I can't believe anything that comes out of his mouth because it has become so bad. He lies about big stuff(drugs, his medicine, school) but he also lies about things that don't matter or tells stories that we know aren't true. He lies to his teachers, family and friends. He will not under any circumstances admit to any lie, and it ends up with me yelling, him yelling and then I walk away. The crazy part to me is that later in the day or the fallowing day he will pretend like the whole thing didn't happen and will be in a great mood. I have begged him to tell me the truth or admit to the truth I can show him with evidence but he absolutely refuses to and has more lies to cover that one. Sometimes I feel like I am the crazy one. I don't understand why he lies as he is extremely popular, we are very open to discussing anything with him regardless of the subject, we tell him repeatedly that no matter what we will always love him, we don't hold grudges or punish unfairly. We try to teach him that no matter how much the truth might hurt it is always better to be truthful as lying just delays peoples reactions as lies are always found out and we will be more upset about the lie itself than what actually happened or was done.

We do have an appointment with his psychiatrist on Monday and hopefully that will lead us into a direction of getting this under control. I will update after his appointment and I thank everyone for posting as before I read this forum I had no clue what I was dealing with and thanks to all the links and personal stories I feel more re assured that we can help our son get past this to live a happy, truthful life

So I figured I would update incase anyone else is going through this as well. We met with his psychiatrist on Monday. We had a very long discussion on what was going on with my son and he also spoke to my son. We have upped his therapy to once a week instead of once every 2 weeks( we just had him diagnosed with adhd this past March and therapy is part of his treatment). They did up his anxiety medicine as well. We did find out when we had him diagnosed they could have also diagnosed him with odd which is obsessive defiant disorder but held off due to the stigma that is attached to it.

After discussing the amount and type of lies he tells, the psychiatrist believes he may be a compulsive liar which is also something that can go along with adhd and be part of what his anxiety stems from. For right now they will work the lieing into his therapy and he also told us how to deal with it at home. We were basically told to tell him we know he is lieing, this is how/why and then to not get into arguing about it.

I will update as we go through his therapy

Thank you for the update. Please do keep us posted on his progress.