Caught, need advice

I have been very depressed and suffering from anxiety. I found this forum while seeking advice from real people and reading their stories, and I feel that I need to share mine. A week ago, I was at work and started getting a very bad anxiety attack. I could not pinpoint where the attack was coming from. When two of my co-workers asked me what was wrong, I lied, and said I needed to leave because my boyfriend had been in an accident. I got in my car and cried, because I had just lied to people I was very close with. A few days later, my boyfriend texted me asking what was up, because one of my co-workers had texted him telling him they were glad he was okay after his accident. I was caught. I called him crying, saying I had no idea what was wrong with me and why I lied. I have told little harmless white lies before, but nothing like this. My depression was spiraling out of control. My boyfriend was very helpful, he calmed me down and talked me through the worst anxiety attack to date. He knew it wasn't like me to lie and knew this was a mental problem, and I wasn't doing it for attention or anything like that. He urged me to talk to my dad, because he was home at that point. I told my dad everything, including being caught in a lie. I asked him to speak to my mother about it, because I couldn't find the courage to say it again. They both promised to get me help and be with me each step of the way. Because of Thanksgiving, offices were closed until today, Monday. The night I was caught, I texted my boss and explained to her that I needed help and time to get treated for depression and anxiety. I told her about the lie, as well. She was surprisingly supportive and told me she would be there for me. Fast forward to today. This morning, I got a text from one of my co-workers saying "Not even an apology?". Cue anxiety attack. I hadn't apologized to either of my co-workers, because I cannot explain myself. I can't explain why I did it. I have been severely struggling with the fact that I lied, and in a way I am glad I was caught, because this is not a habit I want to have and I'm grateful I can nip this in the bud. I did not respond to her. I do not know what to do. They are aware of my depression and anxiety, but I feel that they aren't relating my rock bottom lie to my depression. My mom and I are sitting down today and calling mental health professionals when she gets out of work so I can get help. I am looking forward to getting better and feeling happier, however I really need help on what to say to my co-workers and whether I should wait until I'm better or not. I just don't think they will understand. Please help, this has been consuming me.

hi

i am a compulisive liar, unlike you i lie all the time, again i am depressed due to a traumatic childhood and i know to stop lying i need some proffesional help which i am now currently seeking.

i think you should text them, from experience ignoring things makes you more anxious because it plays on your mind, just get it out the way, make this your first step

I would text something along the lines of

HI XXXXX
Im sorry i lied to you about my boyfriends accident, im not sure what came over me.
i am currently seeking some help for my anxiety and depression, i hope you can find it in you to forgive me.


hope this helps x