Some memories

My father trying to make me believe I was not abused. For example, when I told him he engaged in child abuse he told me that children make-believe these things.

It always felt like he "hated" children. I sometimes wondered if he had pedophilia stuff. He'd say sexually inappropriate things to my friends and my little sister's friends.

prayingforacceptance wrote:My father trying to make me believe I was not abused. For example, when I told him he engaged in child abuse he told me that children make-believe these things.

It always felt like he "hated" children. I sometimes wondered if he had pedophilia stuff. He'd say sexually inappropriate things to my friends and my little sister's friends.

I'm sorry to hear that. He shouldn't have done those things.

Do you have a question?

No, no questions. Just needed to get that out.

prayingforacceptance wrote:No, no questions. Just needed to get that out.

You seem to have been feeling good when you made this post.

Yeah, and I'm calm now. I go in and out of emotion/moods lately. Going No/Limited Contact with my family in November, then my therapist telling me in January that she is retiring in July, and a death of a school director who was a constant in my life for about a decade in January as well...I'm going in and out of pain. And unfortunately I think I'm going to be like this for a while, it's going to take a while for me to mourn.

-- Mon Mar 28, 2016 9:10 pm --

Oh, and did I mention my sister being diagnosed with cancer...she told me a few weeks ago.

She's not going to necessarily die...but I am doing a bone marrow donor kit thing for her as are my two siblings.

Yeah, I feel like God has put a curse on me or something.

I'm sorry to hear about all of that too and my best regards and wishes go out to your sister. I hope she makes a speedy recovery!

How was your relationship with her before she got diagnosed with cancer?

it was terrible and we became estranged. Not anymore. We reconnected not long before she got sick. We now connect with each other very well, it's lovely. My parents unconsciously kept me and my three sibs "apart."

I am now trying to stay away from my parents and make gentle amends with my sibs. I see things very differently since I started No/Limited contact with my parents.