DID issues and invalidation and denial of mental illness.

I have dissasociative personality disorder, formerly known as multiple personality disorder. The vast majority of times this comes from some form of abuse or trauma. I was severly bullied in all fashions at school but particuarlly physical and the teachers joined in on everything but. My parents were also abusive, they would punish me for what happened at school if I retaliated at the bullies by hitting me, yelling at me, or isolating me, where Valkyrie and I got our Borderline Personality Disorder from. The other thing is that is is common for some DID systems to have locked away memories of trauma and abuse and I don't know how to deal with the memories if they come back.

The other thing is my parents (know about anxiety and depression but not DID or BPD) keep on invalidating the body dysphoria (I am trans and I feel trapped in the wrong body and the feeling of being trapped has pushed me to attempt suicide twice so far this year) and the depression, my parents have told me that I am 'silly' and 'stupid' for feeling dysphoria because they are 'good parents' who are doing 'all they can'. My father keeps telling me that I can just get over depression if I try hard enough (a common sentiment) or if I 'try' to fight it (It's called severe for a reason). Whenever I need time to rest or recover from something traumatic or stressful or need time alone to deal with something, he gets angry at me, starts yelling, if I fight back he goes 'See, you do have the energy to do things' then he laughs at me, uses me door and door handle as a way to get back at me (he has broken my door handle twice now and always takes months to even bother putting it back on). If I break or damage something when I can't cope apart from taking it out physically, on my own body or on an object, he makes me pay monetarily for it even though he knew he was purposely winding me me up and then tells me off for not getting him our other people things for Christmas, say.

He knows exactly what he is doing but still keeps doing it and if we tell him that we can't just 'get better and try harder' to recover from mental illness he tells us we are being pessimistic and defeatist. The mother does it too but a lot less and I don't think she knows she does it. They have been doing this for as long as can remember but mental illness gave them a new playing field.

Is this abuse and does anyone have any help for dealing with it that does nto involve talking to them. I could ask an outsider but my parents always act like they are good people and nothing is wrong around others. Honestly not sure how much longer I can wait. Valkyrie is pretty much my only hope for dealing with them but given how much she hates them for what they did and still do that her anger might make things worse.

--Scarlet and half me, half Valkyrie in the second last paragraph.