How to talk to the child

My Granddaughter is being coached by her mother to make accusations of a sexual nature about my son, her father. We know it is coaching as social services and the sherrif department have proof. She has even given them a tape where she apperas to be interrogating the child. Counseling has been court ordered for the family and begins in about a month.
My question is, When my four year old granddaughter repeats these accusations to me how do i respond? She repeats the story of a rape kit that her Mother had completed at the beginning of every visit with us. She also repeats sexual touching stories during each visit ending the story with Mommy told me to say this. When she tells me the story is a secret between us and she appears to want to tell me her secrets.
I was at first shocked but now I feel I might be able to make an appropriate response. All I have said so far is that everyone loves her very much. I state all family names and include her Mothers family.
Thank you for any suggestions.

the wording of your post is hard to follow.....as well as your user name is "social worker". I'm curious as to whether or not you are a certified social worker?


I guess my recommendations in your situations is to seek some family counseling and start sooner then the recommended month starting date issued by the court. Why wait a month? Why not get started right away? Who has custody of your granddaughter? Find out....via the counselor....what angle of counseling they feel is in the best interest of the child.....they may want to start out counseling w/ just the child.....and then see the family seperatly to start out w/.....they may only want to see certain family members to start w/..........how did the courts rule in this situation? Did they rule in favor of the father or against the mother? Was is believed that the father truly did not harm the child (by the courts that is) and that the mother truly was making up the stories and coaching the child so that now the child is confused on what is real and what is make believe or false memories? There is much to work out.......I have no advice to offer on what to say or not to say to your granddaughter at this point having never been in this situation as well as not being a qualified dr. myself. I guess my advice would be to stay in contact w/ your son and work closely w/ whatever therapist your son or daughter-in-law gets for your daughter and family and head their advice. Make sure that what is told to your daughter is discussed w/ your granddaughter consistantly. Don't all start saying things to her on an inconsistant basis at this point as I would assume obviously your main concern is she has been told enough untruths and you don't want to confuse her further in how you handle things from this point going forward trying to clear up things w/ her, etc.

Thank you for your response. I am sorry that what I have written is hard to follow. It is rather complicated. I am a retired Social Worker.
My Son and his wife had marital problems. She moved with the child to her Mothers home. She had a restraining order placed against my Son. The allegations begain to be made following the first visitation. I am ordered to supervise visitation by the court. I take this responsibility very seriously.
I am not very encouraged by the way the court system appears to be handling the situation. There has not been any form of evidence to support anything my Son has been accused of. We have had visits from both the Sherrif and Social Services on several occassions.
When I found that my 4 year old Granddaughter had been taken to the ER and had a rape kit completed on her, I went to the local court and started the process to request the mental health evaluaton myself.
I would like to thank you again. For taking the time to respond