my piece

I'll share my story by which i feel i am profoundly affected from...
I am 20 years old now. In collage.
I have like two major events that effect me today. 1.) i got caught peeking under our pants with a friend (boy) at age 7 or 8. and the man who saw me bullied me. for about 2 or 3 years i avoided him when i saw him down the street. i prayed at age 7 for us to go to another home,or that i dont see him again.later i began praying that he died. so i experienced stress so early.
then like that wasnt enough. at age 11 in 4th grade my class melt with another class.
--How i got my first nickname...
a guy was talking to me,his tounge twisted and sounded like he called me the name of a food. i dont know its name in english.its a red one used for salads...anyway. he called me that by accident and someonw laughed.then another on laughed.and that became my nickname for 3 years. pretty stupid i think.
--Who bullied me?
3 guys. one would throw a word and others would join immediately and noone would get in my help cuz they were scared they would become the target. so i was 60% of the time the target. But i hung out with the guys a lot. we even had good times,i dont go out as much now.
--- What did they say to me
They used massive imagination to come up with insults and me being the target. They would joke about my parents car. When mom would drop me at school, i asked her to park somewhere far far away so noone sees the car.
They joked my clothes. because of that i started wearing expensive clothes hoping they stop. they didnt.
they joked my name. and use it as an insult to each other.
they joked every aspect of my looks.(hair,forehead wrinkles,eyebrows,back,nails,)
I played goalkeeper.Each time i wasnt good at football,the next hour at lunch. they would sit next to each other and start making up things to insult me while eating.
I ofcourse fought back when i could but being every day and everyday, i got tired and gave up.
i think that silence while they insulted me destroyed me.and made what i am to day. a non happy guy.

I am sorry to hear you were bullied - it is tough growing up being bullied by ppl and I understand about the wanting to move to get away from them.

Have you ever talked to a professional about how you feel like a therapist? It sounds like it has had quite a profound effect on you and doing so might help

Cracked