life moves on

There is always hope and happiness

Hi,

Your post is quite honest and has clearly come from your heart. I think that it would be difficult for anyone to reply with 'daggers' to what you've written. plus, it goes to show that behind each 'bad' act are a set of events that can explain-away the act itself. Still, let's not say that everything bad that happens should be dismissed (certainly not serious crimes) for events that preceded them... In your case, you admit that you might have been insecure and then later said that you just wanted her attention. You know what? I was hauled to the principle's office many years ago for bullying another student. Why did I put him down? - because I wanted to be his friend and I didn't know how to go about doing that. So, instead I hurled insults at him. When we are young, we are still learning different ways of socialing and clearly we can end up making mistakes.

Right now, I think that it would be good to perhaps write her a letter explaining everything, and explaining ho apologetic you are. However, DON'T expect a reply. See the letter as putting the 'nail in the coffin', as they say, and then permit your life to move forward. In the future, you can use your wisdom (in relation to bullying...) to help others who are both carrying out the act of bullying and suffering at the hands of one [i.e. a bully].

Kevin