Bullying isn't that bad

Your post was entirely selfish. If bullying isn't that bad, then i guess murder too. If you manage to get away from a murderer, you will be stronger. I witnessed my grandma's stroke when I was a child and I got bullied by relatives. schoolmates and teachers. I did not gain anything from it. I stand up for myself everytime but I've lost faith in this world.

You are strong enough to get away from the side effects of bullying but it is plain rediculous to deem it as it is not that bad. Do you know what you are saying? This is a forum about bullying and there are many victims of bully here. Not everyone can get the help they need and the psychological impact on them. The impact of bullying differs for everyone. Do you know there are many people who commit suicide because of bullying? Bullying has NO benefits at all. I admit I am stronger but it does not make me happier. I put on a strong front so I won't get bullied and I do not trust people so easily.

If you are trying to advocate the benefits of bullying and you make many justified points which I agree on, however spare a thought for the victims. Bullying is not that bad for bullies and being in a pschology forum, I find your thread is offending to people who are trying to seek help. Far from the truth, you make yourself sound more like a bully than a bully victim.

I guess you are immatured to eradicate the anti-bullying movements because I am sure alot of people would not agree and it has nothing to do with being open-minded.

Tribe416 wrote:Your post was entirely selfish. If bullying isn't that bad, then i guess murder too. If you manage to get away from a murderer, you will be stronger. I witnessed my grandma's stroke when I was a child and I got bullied by relatives. schoolmates and teachers. I did not gain anything from it. I stand up for myself everytime but I've lost faith in this world.

You are strong enough to get away from the side effects of bullying but it is plain rediculous to deem it as it is not that bad. Do you know what you are saying? This is a forum about bullying and there are many victims of bully here. Not everyone can get the help they need and the psychological impact on them. The impact of bullying differs for everyone. Do you know there are many people who commit suicide because of bullying? Bullying has NO benefits at all. I admit I am stronger but it does not make me happier. I put on a strong front so I won't get bullied and I do not trust people so easily.

If you are trying to advocate the benefits of bullying and you make many justified points which I agree on, however spare a thought for the victims. Bullying is not that bad for bullies and being in a pschology forum, I find your thread is offending to people who are trying to seek help. Far from the truth, you make yourself sound more like a bully than a bully victim.

I guess you are immatured to eradicate the anti-bullying movements because I am sure alot of people would not agree and it has nothing to do with being open-minded.

(Hi, I am new here.. )

That is the exact same thing that I went through. I am in college now and I feel like I cannot cope. My mother and I have become closer (even though she used to mentally and emotionally abuse me) since my grandmother and grandfather passed away.

Story of my life:

[*]I was bullied in a private christian school in 4th and 5th grade
[*]I transferred to a public middle school (i still have self-esteem and confidence then)
[*]The bulling on got WORSE and it lasted all 3 years
[*]By the time I got to high school I had completely shut down and I could not function properly at school
[*]I had to see a psychiatrist and a therapist, also being put on anti-depressants
[*]I switched to an all-girl middle college and things got a "little" bit better (I missed 30 days my 11th grade year and was in and out of the counselor's office everyday)
[*]I graduated early in December and I witnessed my grandmother have a massive stroke the following January
[*]My life was turned upside down and some family members turned on me and my mom
[*]We lost the house because my mom never worked or did anything to help my grandmother out with bills, ect.
[*]My grandfather passed away from Alzheimer's disease shortly after
[*]She had to go all the way to California (I live in NC) to stay with my aunt
[*]I go to college here (surprisingly) and I am not close to my other family members
[*]I am now sad, lonely, unable to interact with people, and my grades fluctuate up and down

I feel like I cannot connect with other people and form meaningful interpersonal relationships. I feel so lost and alone.

I will keep and keep my head up though because I know things will get better.

Seems to me that it's not an uncommon thing within society for people to believe bullying is a good thing.

I strongly disagree. Pretty much for the reasons stated under these bullying myth articles:

http://www.bullyonline.org/workbully/myths.htm
http://www.bullyonline.org/schoolbully/myths.htm

i have been told the same things about physical and sexual abuse .what don't kill you makes you stronger? i'll agree it changes you but stronger is not how i would describe the aftereffects .

I developed most of my problems BECAUSE of bullying. I mean, some I was born with, but I know I didn't have such a deep fear of other people and paranoia before I went to school.

There's a BIG difference between "teasing" and "bullying". Teasing is normal and most kids go through it. Teasing a kid for doing something inapproriate like picking their nose and then stop teasing them when they stop will help a kid learn what to do and what not to do. But bullying is constant harassment. And it is often for things the child can't even help, like a disorder, their hair (Like having red curly hair for example) or the color of the skin.

A little bit of bullying can even make a child grow stronger...if it STOPS. But it often doesn't stop and at the end of the day it's still terrible. How would you like to be constantly harassed every single school day for 14 years? Do you have any idea what it does to ones mental state? Can you imagine being bullied to the point of crying on a daily basis, and then both being bullied for crying and then punished for it by teachers? 6 year olds being called a crybaby by their teachers even though they try their hardest not to? Add in family troubles, many people have those; some children are even abused at home and then have to come to school to get abused some more, and deaths of parents or relatives and you get one messed up kid.

I came close to being institionalized. I came close to committing suicide. My middle school life was a blur because I was basically a zombie, as if I was a computer that suffered the BSOD (Blue screen of death) due to how severe the bullying was, and I know throught that time I was -still- bullied. The only reason I'm here now, the only reason I can stand on my own two feet, is because of therapy, which I've been in for 7 YEARS, and my mom's support. My friends also helped, but note I HAD NO FRIENDS until I learned how to make them...when I was 14. All I knew until that point was bullies. That's what I thought everyone was.

It's also not only children who bully children. Adults can bully children as well. Are you to say that makes them stronger too? Here's a newsflash: Being beaten mentally and physically by the people a child is supposed to trust is NOT GOOD for them.

indeed, usually bullying is not one or two times NO its somebodys whole elementary school and highschool time, and also by strangers and in holidays etc. At least for me. Its called ..revictimization, I believe.

I know this thread and many of the posts are very old... but something struck a chord with me.
It was the comment about children "ducking out" of school and the parents being to blame for allowing it.

When I was 15 I was sexually bullied by two male peers, I ended up having flashbacks and nightmares and eventually had a panic attack and was unable to attend school out of fear. I loved school and I had very good grades, but that bullying incident (I had been bullied previously throughout my school years as well) pushed me over the edge so to speak and even 4 years later I have not been able to return to school and finish my education.
If you were a parent and saw that your child was very depressed and incapable of leaving the house without having severe anxiety, are you honestly going to push your child and cause further damage?

Maybe I am weak minded (not a sarcastic remark, I realize that the poster ammended their choice of words) and maybe being bullied was a good thing because it weeded out someone who was not capable of handling constant personal slights... That doesn't make me any less of a person, and I would like to think that we live in a time where people deserve to be respected.

So, although I respect the opinions expressed in this thread, I cannot agree that bullying "isn't that bad". I have the medical records and scars to prove the damage it can sometimes do to a person and their self-worth.

The ideas in the OP have been discarded by society, for good reason, they're nonsensical.