School Bullies at Work

Don't you find it annoying when a former school bully visits your workplace and wants to chat.

Points to consider:
- What if they act as if they had never hurt you in the past?
- What if they had ignored you or had never said a simple "Hello" to you throughout high school?
- What if you do not give a damn about listening to them brag about their own life.
- What if you suspect that they only want to talk to you for gossip's sake (to have something to talk about to their friends?).
- What if you suspect that they don't really care about you but they actually want to compare your life to their own life?
- What if a slanderous rumor had previously been spread about you from a school bully but you do not know which person had started it.
- What if that former school bully asks too many personal questions. However, you cannot respond with "It's not your concern" etc, because your current boss- who unfortunately works within two arms distance next to you- is a bully.
- What if you are not married, have no kids, have an ordinary office job, or have not achieved any major accomplishments?
- What if you do not care to offer them your trust again. They already had their LONG chance to know you. Life is short, there are too many other new people to get to know and learn to trust. Trust is a difficult think for me thanks to the school bullying I had endured.
- What if the former school bullies think it's okay to talk too much; however, you are far too busy at work to listen to them?
- What if you believe that they will never speak to you again apart from this workplace encounter? Why bother providing them with private information (especially if it could encourage rumors about you to be spread)?

I wouldn't give any private information. Well, i rarely give any really private iinformation anyway, unless i know someone very well.

I would smalltalk the most neutral and short possible, and use a technique to make them go away.

The first one that come to my mind is : center the conversation on themselves. If possible some topic that they don't like

Or be very long and boring and polite, explaining with many details all you have to do and why you have no time to answer their questions.

Or give them very very technical informations about your job and explain and explain so precisely - if possible making things ununderstandable

Or - that's what i'd probably do - salute them politely and then do your job a if they didn't exist. If they stay, after 5-10 minutes tell them that you are sorry but you have to work and please if they can leave - then salute them very politely (DON'T offer them to come back)

It doesn't matter much what you say, provided you stay quiet and polite and you give them a very deep and strong need to run away



Thinking of it - it happened to me that some acquaintance that i met in the park begin to smalltalk and ask very private information. I gave 1 or 2 answers then felt so uncomfortable that i said : i'm sorry i've absolutely to go. Then i pursued quietly my walk. Later i saw them again and they didn't talk anymore.

I'm sorry for your office condition. I agree that you should not give any private information.

For the personal question, give the most general answer to them. General Answer is boring. Be one-liner, if possible just give one word for the answer. Don't tell the details.

You can politely say to them that you need to work and too distracted by the chat. This tactic always works for me.

Pretend to listen to their brags. Focus yourself on work or something else. Give them one-liner response if needed.