Are my friends bullies/Abusive or am I at fault?

Hi everyone

I don't know how to start this but I have extremely low self esteem & sense of self worth (for full story look at my other posts if that would help you understand more) but my dad has always been emotionally abusive(sometimes Physically) and I hate myself and think i'm stupid and worthless etc. But this post is about my relationship with my friends. I have known them since year 8 and i'm in about to finish yr 11 they don't respect me at all. They post photos of me on Facebook without my permission and i have asked many times for them to stop but they just laugh and tell me its funny that im overreacting and tell me to shut up because apparently i love getting my life turned into a joke. The nickname they gave me in year 8 is the only thing they will call me my entire school calls me the nickname and no one is allowed to say my actual name because its a swear word and they make a joke out of everything in my life i have many chronic illnesses that really affect my life and they make jokes about them. Im allergic to cats i told them this and they put cat hair on me threw my friends cat at me and made it crawl over me when i was sleeping they keep doing it and laughing even when i was red and itchy and my eyes were so sore they steal my stuff out of my pocket and locker and hide it they run away from me they invite me out them passively hint that they don't want me to come. they make fun of all my problems they wont listen to me or listen to my opinion if i have an issue i cant talk to them about it i have literally begged them to stop doing the things they do and they just laugh and say that i'm over reacting and that i do like it its gotten to the point where i just go along with the joke because its easier. Im also transgender and about to transition and the first thing they told me when i told them was that they were still gonna call me the nickname instead of the name i picked out. i cant answer questions they ask because i'm afraid that they will make a joke out of it and i cant trust them ever she asked if i liked Justin Bieber and i couldn't do it because i feel like she wants to make me feel bad. But the issue is i think the arguments are my fault I call one of the friends in particular mean names and i react very poorly to her annoying me or bullying me i call her fat and stupid because she's an easy target i only do this in retaliation to the above i get angry and lose it and I have explained to her many times I don't mean it that I'm sorry and that I just lose control and that its not an excuse but i need them to listen to me once in a while and i feel terrible i'm no better than them or my dad but i feel like its my fault and i have tried to not be there friends but it doesnt last i keep crawling back for some reason just like i did when me dad was abusive i still forgaive him.

i know im at fault for a lot of it sorry for the rant

No, you are not at fault. They are certainly bullies from what you have written. Why do you have to tell them every thing about yourself like being transgender and all that? The more information you give the more scope they have to bully you. Don't you have even ONE friend to support you? Also remember that bullies feed on your reaction. Let them do their worst. Don't react. Ignore them or tolerate them whenever you can and they will soon get bored. Avoid begging. Don't give any importance to them. Above all, do not consider them your friends any more. At the same time don't antagonize them. Be passive. Best thing is to pretend to be unwell. If they ask you why you have changed you can simply tell them you are not feeling well. They will be unable to elicit any reaction from you and they will realise all their actions are being wasted and stop pestering you.

They are definetely bullies. I have persotnal experience with these types of bullies. They have also inviting me and then behave to me like i'm a dirt. I also couldn't talked them out of this. If asked them why they don't respect me, the replied with why they should and so on. After awhile i have decided to stop going out with because it was just a waste of time. You should do the same.

If you didn't consent to it, you have the right to request that they stop. You shouldn't subject yourself to that if you don't want it and feel you have no control. It could leave lasting scars. You have the right to stand up for yourself and take control of your own life.

It can be very easy to want to retaliate, but if they won't respect your feelings, it's likely you won't gain respect by retaliating. Sometimes, people bully other people because they have issues going on in their own lives. You have the right to live your life free of bullying and harassment.

You should not have told them that you are transgender; it's hard to believe, I guess, but any little thing that makes you different will make you a target as a kid. Kids are scared, and they compensate for their fears by finding "others" who are weaker or weirder than they are. It's insane, really, but, the good news is the adult world isn't like that, yet...

When someone bullies someone else it's not the victim that causes the bullying, it's something inside the head of the person doing the bullying.

They are not your friends, but you know this, right?

You keep going back to them because you are probably lonely and feel, due to the abuse from your father, that you are partly to blame and that you deserve the bullying. Clearly this isn't true and you have a right to be treated with dignity.

You need to talk to someone professionally about this, otherwise this will continue past school.

Liking Justin Bieber is also a psychological problem which needs to be dealt with.