I am a new adult who is being bullied (long sorry)

HI I am new and I am an adult in my 40s. I have been shy and quiet all my life. Some time ago I joined a club (think Rotary, etc.) and have held a number of posts from secretary to treasurer. Generally my experience has been good. Recently I took on the chair's position, not willingly, but I felt that it was my time to take the role. It has been a living hell. Firstly one member threatened to quit because I had not given enough attention to his favorite causes...secondly one member expressed anger to me because I had made a decision on my own (it was something that had to be made immediately) and he also nearly yelled at me when a meeting was cancelled and he was inadvertantly not informed. But the worst and the one that gives me a lot of stress and anxiety is one member who last summer during a fund raising event made comments about a couple of minor mistakes I made and then humiliate me in front of others by suggesting that during the day I had not contributed to the effort as much as the others...no of the others said a word. I did my usual thing and turned the other cheek and said nothing. Mercifully this jackass has not been to any meetings since the summer, but the few times I have run into him, you can read by his body language the contempt he holds for me. I was all ready to give up the post of chair, but the guy who was to take over is having second thoughts (he by the way gets on fine with the Jackass). The Jackass of course, will not take on the position as Chair because he is "too busy" (while the rest of us sit on our fannies eating bon-bons, I quess.) We have a meeting coming up and it sounds like he will be in attendance: I am very afraid. I am afraid that he will openly humiliate me and that I will get mad. When I am pushed too far I blow up, and often I find that the "pusher" then uses my anger to manipulate the situation and make me look worse. I really want to get out of this abusive club...but I fear that I will look weak and foolish...you know 100% that the Jackass will plead innocence and will turn the tables and make himself look a victim. I feel my biggest error was not standing up to him at the summer fund raiser: when he implied I was not pulling my weight I should have told him to "blank himself", and then resigned. I don't often swear but when I do, people know I am angry. I know that resigning at the time would have left me vulnerable to him manipulating the situation and making me look bad, but I feel at least I would have been out of this abusive organization. Any advice is welcome...

Your very right jPb. When you dont stand up for yourself a trend developes, and people like that man might take liberties on what he precieves you to be, which is a door mat.

I think you know what to do. And my opinion is just forget about his minipulations and petty BS and move on from that organization. And the next time if there ever is one dont hesitate to stand up for yourself.

Toughen up and get the energy you need.
Check the link in my sig - and I wish you the best.

Happy Holidays Everyone!