Am I a victim or just ignorant *may trigger*

I moved into my dad's 1 bedroom condo 5 years ago after moving away from my mothers household because I wanted to clean up my drug addiction. The president of the condo and her sister, and brother (the guy that I'm going to be referring to in this post) all live in the building. There's 8 units in the entire place, so it's kind of hard to be an anonymous neighbor. Well anyways, the building is very very old and made entirely out of concrete. When I first moved in I was a ###$ I would smoke and ditch cigs all over the yard and stay up late watching TV ( albeit as low volume as i could whilst still being able to hear the commentary ). They eventually had a council meeting that banned smoking on the premises.. I soon-after quit smoking.
This guy used to live next door, and the unit above us there was this couple that was very very noisy. This lady would walk around in high heels at 7am getting ready for work (which is understandable, but frustrating as there was NO CARPET up there... and old building). At night time or early morning hours you can hear everything. I used to hear this lady moaning in the morning, or snoring at night, even so much as BREATHING loudly at night. kinda creepy, right.
Well anyways this couple eventually moved out around 2 years ago ( I think due to all these combined factors, and my late at night sleep schedule.. They ended up moving. Now this guy who lived next door, one of his rooms was originally part of the unit that I live in, but the door was sealed shut and painted over. So as you can imagine the sound penetration through that wall was VERY VERY LOUD. Can hear someone talking and make out the conversation at a normal volume.
OKAY so this is kind of awkward but this is worth mentioning because I think its important. I masturbate... like most normal people, I used to do it like 3 times a day tho as it help keep me calm and happy and helps to keep my anxiety levels down after I orgasm. Well using lube is , you know, loud, and obvious. This guy next door kind of kept it a secret that the wall was this thin so I never really knew that he could hear me masturbating this loudly, or I would have tried a little harder to keep it down, but I actually just didn't really give a ###$ I am a sexual person with needs and having no GF wtf any 20+ would be doing this. Anyways,
His sister lives upstairs adjacent to me and she used to jingle keys outside my unit door before my dad would come home because this was usually the time I would end up masturbating, like 20 minutes before he would come home... I would wake up around 12-3pm, masturbate at like 4:30-5.... I think they all heard me and I think her brother, this guy nextdoor got jealous of his sister hearing me , or just outright thought i was either sinful or disgusting.
He ended up moving ABOVE my unit, okay, now everything was cool for a couple months. I started noticing that he would pound above my unit like he was my snooze to my alarm clock If I had something to do like go to classes, or work. If i had an alarm set everyday sometimes he would pound on he ceiling a couple minutes before... now all this I just brushed off as coincidence for about 3 months.. until one day at 3:30 am i heard VERY LOUD pounding above my head.
I spoke with the guy the next day or two about it and he denied it happening. I asked him If my music bothered him? and I told him that the walking upstairs is very loud and it would be nice if he could try to keep it down, especially at those hours. I was very apologetic about my music and loudness he seemed to just brush everything off like it didn't exist.
So the next year or so I've been jobless. This guy never leaves, and neither do I usually. Im a gamer i stay up all night tapping keys (keyboard is kinda loud). For about a year I would go to sleep at least at 3am and be woken up at 7am by loud pounds, stomping, sometimes almost as if he was running. Every time I would slide my door to go into the bathroom he would do a single loud stomp above my head while I was pissing. Every time and i mean EVERY TIME I opened my fridge to eat or grab a drink he would stomp above my head. I don't think he's missed a single one of my meals for over a year... I started getting very suspicious that he was being malicious as it is very frustrating the types of patterns he would use to pound while I was eating a meal. It actually started ruining my meals.
And this is where it gets really creepy. I would masturbate in the bedroom tp porn on my computer. And I $#%^ you not at the end of the videos, seconds if not the exact second I would orgasm this guy would be doing a loud stomp above my room, and then would run water for a few seconds just before I would clean up... I started thinking that he was hacking my connection, and viewing everything on my computer because I honestly was as quiet as possible about this. No other person (that didnt assume I would masturbate right before 5pm before my dad came home would be able to hear me do this)
And now for the most frustrating part of all, As soon as I go silent aka turn my TV off, stop typing, etc. This tapping above my bed begins, about every 5-10 minutes a moderately loud thump or sliding chair have you. This will last for about 1-2 hours. Now I was unaware that this guy was doing this maliciously or I would have changed my sleep schedule sooner but it has gotten to the point that I can't relax my brain to fall asleep because I'm constantly expecting a tap or thump to keep me awake. This used to keep me up all hours of the night, and then finally in the morning he would start doing loud work, hammering, or anything, making it almost unbearable. I was sleep deprived for a long time., and becoming infuriated with every single stomp from upstairs, like surges of adrenaline and anger everytime I would try to open my fridge, or take a shower, and he would be listening for me. I actually screamed shut the ###$ up a few times, SHUT THE ###$ UP STOP WAKING ME UP. And the pounding got slightly quieter, but not good enough.
I know that the simplest solution is to ######6 MOVE , but the sad truth is I have no money, job, or friends in this area that I can actually LIVE with.... I lost my car and since then this guy has been it seems like monitoring me very closely, adjusting his schedule to in order to sleep deprive me, and rewire my brain to feel negative/guilt when doing something sexual,.. which is actually kind of happening. I kind of feel nausea 24/7... its hard to explain.

In the midst of all this #######4... I was taking adderall for a couple months and developed panic disorder which coupled with whats happening with the harassment is having a very negative impact on me. I used to do drugs before I moved down here and used to kind of have psychosis when I would smoke pot, or come down from cocaine which kind of ###$ up my brain I think my dopamine receptors, I also have schizophrenia in my family. But I don't want whoever is reading this to think that this neighbor problem is all in my head or that I'm hearing $#%^ because I swear to god I brushed it off as coincidence for this exact reason for almost 2 years... (huge mistake, as he has gained so much leverage in this time while I was completely trying to mind my own business and my dad was telling me that this guy is just in his own world)

I now wake up at 7am and go to sleep early(past 3 days) but consistently he will wake me up at 4am so there's no real way to get a full nights sleep 8 hours straight. My ears are swollen and red from earplugs every night. I also have aloud box fan to try to drown out the noise but he will STOMP and assure that I wake up... EVERY time I try to sleep.
Its like torture. I can't believe someone would dedicate this much effort and hatred. I mean YEARS without letting me eat a meal in peace and quiet. YEARS
I really just want to break his windows or tell him to ###$ off or just tackle his ass and beat him down but I cant really bring myself to do any of these things and I dont feel like being punished for doing them.

What should I do? I'm hyper-vigilant as ###$ now... Take an ssri for a while?

I could move back home and live with my mom and her boyfriend but that's a complete dead end and cold as hell with snow. I would rather stay down south in the sunshine with the beautiful women.... and beach, and rich lifestyle, but I can't even get a proper nights sleep to be working on education and school. I just feel so disgusting that this guy is stomping the second I have orgasms for years and every time I eat, and not letting me get sleep for hours after I try to lay down... why the ###$... I'm just at a loss I feel like a torture victim. ...


I know your going to say move get out of there but I have no place to go without a job, or car. I don't think my mom and her boyfriend want me moving back home to where I was raised as a kid, that's just embarrassing anyways as I am in my mid twenties now. I want to move on and live my life but its just so ######6 awkward that I'm being monitored by this guy... If you made it this far what would you do.

any advice would be appreciated.

I also want to note I've had social anxiety disorder since grade school(self medicated with drugs and alcohol but no longer on the hard $#%^ for a couple years now), and now a newly developed panic disorder since I took adderall for a couple months. I flipped my car and totaled it which I only remember a split second of. I may have PTSD from that. I have nightmares almost nightly the scariest $#%^ you could imagine. I've been a binge drinker for a little over a year now. I have no job, friends (alienated myself from almost everyone from my past in high school, and feel awkward around my families), money, and my dad wants me out of the house for being a lazy ###$ up who doesn't contribute. I have poor conversational skills for someone my age and I am definitely behind the curve. Which is frightening.
I'm very misunderstood, because of the SAD, contributing to low confidence which makes it impossible to have a conversation and truly express my feelings as they are blunted if not completely strangled by the SAD the second I try to express them in front of another person.

I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist coming up next week. Should I tell him all of this right out? I'm actually developing so much anger towards this guy I want to STAY here FOREVER TO JUST PISS HIM OFF WITH MUSIC AND TV AND $#%^. I've been doing it the past few days and it feels good to feel like I have the upper hand but it also just feels like the exact opposite of my original morals and being in complete disbelief that this #####& would dedicate this much time and dedication to trying to force me out.