scared of ... being FAT???

Fat is such a nastly word. I think of people on tv and maybe in real life who wear too tight clothing and show there tummies. I know that I am smaller than a lot of my friends and coworkers, but I still consider myself FAT. I am 130 lb, I'm 5.5 feet. I'm average. I wear a size 4-5. I KNOW I am not fat, but that's how I feel. I often think that its insulting to people that are bigger than me, so I do not say things out loud. I do envy people who are "bigger' than me and wear nice clothing and are confident. I know a lot of pretty girls, who maybe I would like to be who are a size 10. 11 .12 or maybe 16. Its all about the mental state. I love when people big or small wear clothing that hug their bodies-not skin tight, but flattering. I can't do that-i am too FAT. See the difference? FAT is a bad word. Maybe I'm insensitive to say 'bigger' I'm not meaning too, its the only word I can think of comparing small and big

. . . being small and thinking small isn't always a good thing. . . thinking BIG about the world and your life is how it should be . . . and yes even though I have BIG plans I wish I was small. . . how confused is that????

wow, im pretty much very insulted by your post fatlady. so because your happy to be overweight you think everyone should be just like you? you make it sound liek people with ed's are just shallow and looking at the wrong things in life. you wouldnt tella schizophrenic to just SNAP OUT OF IT would you? if you believe that eating disorders a choice then fine, its subjective, and i guess to a small extent there is an element of choice, but you're assuming that everyone, that people that have been beaten down in life and gone through hell and have self loathing beyond what you will ever experience should automatically have the strength to make the right choices all the time! and bdd not being a mental ilness? the canvas of scars and burns that is my 28 inch stomach begs to differ.
i admire the human body, i love to look at people who are healthy and happy and i find the body to be a fascinatting creation. but no amount of silly little affirming mantras and deep breathing can overpower a mind that is ILL!

It really is insulting to say that people with EDs are scared of being fat. It may be partially about weight, but weight is something we can control. You're probably right when you say that people with EDs are generally scared, but I can assure you it's not of being fat. It could be scared of dealing with something that happened (death, abuse etc) or just having some control when everything else in life is out of control. Look into the lives and minds of people eating disorders and you'll find that what they weigh really isn't the worst thing in their lives, it's just an escape.

I think scared is the wrong word. None of us WANT to be fat, but we aren't scared. For me, diets didn't work, and I wanted to wear certain clothes, and feel good about myself. Mia was the answer for me. Other people choose exercize, or dieting, or surgery. You can't criticize one over another because they all stem from the same desire; to be thin. Yep, society tells us that's what we have to be, and that is the ho0w most people are socialized.

If you can be happy with whatever weight you are, power to you, since it takes a very strong un-self-conscious person to do that. I can't, and I would venture to say that most people can't. And while those methods of becoming thin may be unhealthy, being fat is just as equally unhealthy. It isn't a choice for us.

I agree with some of your statements, about how people should accept themselves as they are, and think of themselves as beautiful funny smart people. But reality is a bitch, and life is not so simple.

We definitly aren't out to insult you. EDs are very selfish disorders; it is ALL ABOUT US, and all about us being thin. We aren't thinking about you being 60lbs overweight, and we shouldn't be. Just like you should be thinking of yourself, and not us. To each their own. If you are comfortable at your weight, congratulations. We won't be happy, or stop, until we are comfortable with ours.