I know what's going on but have no-one with the same trouble

yeah the guy I see is a cognative person-have stopped though at the mo. Don't really think about food all that much anymore-still get a bit iffy round it if i'm having an off day like today. Whats replaced the ED and always thinking about food, is now depression and always thinking about everything that depresses me (friends and family etc). Have been going to the gym alot, but have seen no rewards for my hard work-must be that i'm eating too much-i think its a lie, the less you eat the more weight you loose. I'm going to try hard to eat less and see if it changes anything!
Hope your good nottooclever-how have you been

Well I guess everything is kind of the same- I've still been binging then trying to restrict. Everything has been really bad recently though because I'm alone in the house.
I think the main thing that is getting me down at the moment is the fact that I can't stop myself from binging and worrying about how much weight I have put on.
Plus my family won't stop criticising everything I do- yesterday I had a really bad day and I binged and purged so many times that I lost count. I didn't know what to do so I shut myself in the dining room and cried. Then my mum and sister started calling me pathetic and selfish because I didn't go out and help my brother to deliver papers. I tried to explain that I didn't feel like being around anyone because I was so fat. Then in the end I had to tell them the reason I didn't go out was because I needed to make myself sick. She didn't understand and said that I was "beyond help"- which was nice of her.
It really upsets me (my families lack of understanding of me). I feel totally isolated from them because everything in their life revolves around food. Is this the main thing that bothers you about your family?
I think your right about the less food you eat the thinner you are- although exercise is important if you eat loads it won't make a difference. How much is 'less'?
I've been trying to restrict what I eat to about 500 cals a day but as soon as Ieat I can't stop so I'm just going to not eat again. I'm hoping it will make me feel better.

yeah I'm like that-once I eat I generally eat too much. I've been trying to be good and eat slow and consciously, I think i'm better-I will try and leave stuff on my plate though and instantly throw it away when I've had too much. I've been pigging out a bit on fatty things-so starting from tomoz I'm not having anything sweet. The other night I told myself I wasn't going to eat anything after 6, and I wetn tot eh fridge like three times and took only grapes! I was so proud of myself, I will try so hard to think things through. I need to plan what I'm going to eat then I won't stick things in my mouth, if I stick to the plan then I won't let myself!
I think you have to have strong will power, once you start eating your body craves more food as it's kinda in gorge mode as you've starved yourself.
I feel so fat at the moment, I have been doing this excerise task thats meant to give you thinner legs in three weeks. I think I'm going to have to start again on it, doesn't seem to have any effect so far eat less for sure. I'm going to find a low GI food plan now and stick to that this week.
The mian thing that bothers me about my family is their general lack of interest in me. I feel completely ignored and to be honest when I think back have been all my life, I don't feel a closeness to them at all, and I don't really want to be around any of them-they depress me becasue they are so crap towards me. I feel like I don't have a family, I wish I could cut them off!

Hey, notthatclever and lluvy! You haven't posted in a while. How are you guys doing?

Hey jasmin- thanks for asking! I'm not to much different than I was before though unfortunatly. I'm still binging, purging and restricting altough now its worse and its putting a lot of strain on my relationship with my mum. She has seen me eat normally recently so when I stop eating she thinks I'm just messing her around. I'm not though, when I eat anything I do it to punish myself and I end up crying. I wish I could tell her that but sometimes I think its probably nicer for her to think I'm a troublesome teenager than actually being unable to cope with food or anything else.
I don't think this will ever go away because I can't cope without it, if I didn't control food then I would be completly out of control in every area of my life. Its weird because my eating disorder has become my identity so I don't want it to go away. I also need a method of punishing myself because I deserve food and because I've been fat in the past.
I'm doing CBT now which started a few days ago, so maybe that will make a difference.
Do you have an eating disorder?

Hey! I seem to have a problem with controlling food and eating a lot when I'm stressed, without even realising it, but I'm not sure if it's a disorder. It might be, I supose.
Working on myself seems to help with everything. Finding a hobby and doing things that help with my self esteem is good.
Have you tried that? What do you do to try and take your mind off it? Maybe you won't be rid of your disorder completly, but it can get better.
It's kind of you to protect your mom. You shouldn't be going through this alone, though. Try talking here when you're down. You'll feel better soon.