Flushing my life away TW

This whole thing....bulimia and everything that comes with it....so "wonderful" medical illness, depression, fears and so on. I have always kept things to myself...and one way I could feel better was to eat....eat eat eat...but then feeling unworthy, having everything being so locked up....I have to get rid of it. I feel so much better. Its like having everything bad happen to you and getting rid of it.
But yeah...exactly sounds to good to be true.
What a cycle...it never ends.
I think it makes me feel better.....but it doesnt...guilt guilt guilt....I hate this $#%^.
All I do anymore is binge and purge....this bulimia takes up all my time,
Im just flushing my life down the toliet....

I'm sorry you feel this way and that it's such a hard process to stop.

I have to get rid of it. I feel so much better. Its like having everything bad happen to you and getting rid of it.

That is kind of how I feel about cutting. I'm letting all the bad thing's out. They are both pretty bad cycle's and I'm sorry you have to go through this. I wish you the best of luck. If you need anything you can PM me. Your in my thoughts.

Take care,
Kayty

The cycle does appear never-ending sometimes (I know) but it WILL end. Nothing lasts forever, ever. Just don't completely destroy your hopes of recovery. If you need to take a breather from the mental pain then just allow yourself to binge. With less pessimism surrounding binging maybe things will then improve without even noticing. The trick is to forget about food and start getting other things into your life.


What you have is terrible and yet it is so common nowadays. There still isn't enough done by governments of the world to tackle eating disorders.


Kevin