Why doesn't my family believe I have bpd?

So I've been diagnosed with bpd and clinical depression by 3 different doctors. I even have the proof on paper. But my family especially my mother doesn't believe and says I can't blame my problems on something, it's all my fault, I need to grow up and take responsibility. She also refuses to believe that I have depression and bpd. I said to her so 3 different doctors are wrong? And she said yes, I was just faking it. Why the hell would I fake it? Now due to my last suicide attempt she refuses to have anything to do with me and won't let me speak to my little sisters. I've asked her to read up on bpd to see if she can understand but she refuses to. She is in total denial. I am known as the black sheep and screw up of the family and they want nothing to do with me. I have no friends and just feel so alone. I wonder sometimes if it would be best for me to end everything. But I know that's not an option, I just need to tough it out. I'm having a bad day today

A thought of why your mother among others would deny your contitions might be because you, logically, are their offspring, so they might percieve that any sign of you having problems is a sign that they caused it, which is quite common amongst people to deny. If it relates to total denial, however, then they might aswell might be targets for a disorder. If they would relate any consciousness to that, then that's just another reason for them to deny some more.

Note: It's a thought, not a clear answer.

I agree with Svion they're either scared we're gonna blame them or they have something personal keeping them from believing it themselves either way it doesn't usually help us. My family is the same way especially my mom she refuses to believe i have bpd she was part of the reason i denied it for so long. She doesn't even know I've accepted it or that I'm back in therapy for it. She always told me it was in my head as well and i just needed to grow up get a life and get out of my head. I personally think they don't wanna be blamed for it even if sometimes the things they did may have caused some of it.

When I first started to become 'ill' my Family kept telling me to snap out of it and that there was 'no need' for my behaviour. They were completly unsympathetic which served to make me feel even worse. So I isolated myself for a long time. My family tend to be the type who don't openly talk about anything that isn't the weather or what's for tea which and although I find this REALLY hard, I now understand that it's because of the way they were brought up, not to talk about emotions, therefore my Mother would seem to actually not know HOW to talk to me about my problems. When I was growing up my Mother would tell me that 'talking's a weakness!'
It's got better over the last year or so, my family tend to understand that it's not just me 'playing up'. However I know I can only talk to certain people who I know understand or at least want to understand... A good friend and my therapist, not to mention the people on here which I've recently found a really valuable resouce. I've come to the conclusion that my family aren't ever going to be there how I would like and I've had to accept that. Whatever the reason's your family have for not believing you, I know how harsh that feel's. We all need to be understood don't we and although most people don't, there are some that do. It's just a matter of finding them.
Is there anyone you DO talk to?

Svion's right; many parents equate any imperfection with their child as a sign of failure on their part as parents. The irony is that by trying to stifle it, they're quite probably exacerbating the problem. Don'tcha just love self-fulfilling prophesies?

Classic invalidating environment. It's exactly the sort of family dynamic that's said to lead to BPD in the first place.

Wow Beatrix never thought about it like that but you're right.

Beatrix Kiddo wrote:Classic invalidating environment. It's exactly the sort of family dynamic that's said to lead to BPD in the first place.

That's a bloody good point!!!

My family is the same way. I have a sister who understands, because she also has it, and a mother who understands, because she has emotional issues as well. As far as the rest of the fam, you might as well forget it. I have a dad who thinks im just messed up because i didnt take my meds as a teen for ADHD, I have a step mom who thinks its all just an excuse not to live life, I have another sister who says Im just a drama queen, and a brother who thinks im just saying all of this just to get attention. It makes it so hard, the one set of people you should be able to turn to most, pretty much you arent able to turn to them at all. I see myself trying to seek acceptance from other families and friends from church. Even then, it only lasts a few months at tops. Eventually, it all turns out the same, it becomes too emotionally draining for them, then I have to start strait from scratch. I hate it!!!

I have to say that I have struggled with this in the past. I was diagnosed and been in treatment for about five years now. My father still to this day believes that what is wrong with me is due to using an inhaler because I have asthma. It took me a long time to 'get over' this ridiculous opinion of his. But I slowly came to terms with it. I have never felt better about coming to terms with it. My anxiety and symptoms have gone down and I don't believe anymore that I am weak or purposely acting this way. I have come to the conclusion that BPD is so complex and extremely hard to understand that some people in this world are just not capable of truly understanding and coming to terms with a diagnosis like this. It isn't that they are purposely trying to be malicious (unless they are sociopathic so for arguements sake lets say they aren't) it is that they can't wrap their head around the entire thing. BPD isn't like a 'tangible' disease like diabetes where there is a definite explanation to the route of the cause. I hope this helps.