Lost out at sea...

Has anyone ever been with someone manipulative to the point where it feels like they dangle a life preserver out there in front of you... just to pull it away when you get a hold? All for a little attention?

It feels like this girl, and the 2 previous girls I've been with, get involved with me and the honeymoon period is the best. I feel on top of the world. They, I assume feel the same. But, then they change. I always let them know a little about my issues and they say it's fine. "Everyone has problems". And then it starts becoming different, like, I push them away. But, instead of letting me know things aren't going well for them, they keep me hanging on. I muster enough courage and strength to say I need more in a relationship and they usually say nothing or agree, but a day or two later end up saying they want me back and will work on trying to fix things.

Well things never get better with these girls. For example, one night with one I had plans to see her and spend the evening together, only to never hear from her again that evening... Until the next day when there was an excuse. A valid one which i agreed upon. Then I asked for them to say something next time, or hell.. text me, because things like that tend to hurt me more than it might hurt the next person. Well after a week of barely talking we finally get together and everything is fine. I feel important again. After a while longer we plan another night. Again, no phone call, no text, no nothing. Which now it's been 24 hours since I've replied to her latest excuse.

Am I the only one? Is that just how normal people handle things? Do I just attract people who only keep me around for attention here and there, or do I make people turn to that? If I didn't know better, and hadn't been in one relationship for years where I felt like they cared... I would completely give up.

Wesleyclark wrote:Has anyone ever been with someone manipulative to the point where it feels like they dangle a life preserver out there in front of you... just to pull it away when you get a hold? All for a little attention?

Not a life preserver, but some sort of honest interaction, and then the minute it gets too close that way they push away by doing things that exacerbate things or try to wind me up. I don't know what they think they want from a relationship but they can't have it when they treat people that way - in my case the only thing that comes back at people when they treat me that way is anger, and people can't have both that and some cosy relationship, they just don't go together too well. Instead they just end up feeding my anger - which isn't something I've ever required from relationships or genuine friendships in the past so there's no reason it should be now, that and whatever their need is.

-- Thu Aug 09, 2012 12:41 am --

Or on second thoughts in response to recent messages maybe they're just a total arse.