verbal attacks

Has anyone ever had verbal attacks or torn through people in a raging tornado or lashed back and overreacted to people who say something against you or cut you off as being a friend .... or because your perception is different at the time you see them as bad or against you and have a verbal attack that is really horrible, nasty etc and then been so guilty and distressed or embarrassed, ashamed about it for ages you feel like the worst person like a demon or psycho and will go to hell or when you die nobody will care and punish yourself or deny yourself and allowing to ever try be happy.

Also paranoid about running into people that you have had arguments or problems with online and / or offline and they will bash you or cause trouble ?

I used to struggle with ragefests alot more than than I do now...that's what I called them. I would fly off the handle if I felt defensive or if I was experiencing stress. I've learned a clever technique that has really helped me.

When I am experiencing rage I take a moment and think about what I would like to do to express that rage....then I do the opposite.

For instance, if I'm supposed to meet a friend for lunch and she cancels (for whatever reason) this may trigger my rage and fears of abandonment. When I start feeling that way I take a few deep breaths and just let the feeling be. I observe it objectively and try to stay calm...deep breaths, being aware of how my emotions are making me feel physically and voicing my feeingls all help me to stay calm. While in the past I would have lashed out and verbally abused my friend (usually on a voicemail or text) I simply do the opposite action. I might call and tell her how much she means to me and that I was disappointed that she had to cancel but that I understand.

Before I know it I'm feeling a difference in my mood and our relationship has grown stronger. I also don't have to worry about additional feelings of guilt, shame or remorse for going off.

It takes a lot of practice but its a skill that definitely works for me.

In the event that I do go off and rage I apologize immediately when I recognize my inappropriate behavior. I don't make excuses..I simply apologize for my actions. I try not stay in the past because I know I can't affect the past...only the future.

I have a great group of friends and part of our wonderful relationship is due to the fact that I have given my support system and friends my permission to NOT take any crap from me. They have my permission to call me on my actions if they aren't appropriate and I thank them for that.

I wish you the best and hope this has been helpful.

Yeah .. sometimes i can't control my moodswings or rage attacks.

I have apologised to a couple of people i want in my life and am taking it slowly. For everyone else I can not. They would not want to hear from me but i guess they won't let some words kill their life.

rebba87 wrote:Yeah .. sometimes i can't control my moodswings or rage attacks.

I have apologised to a couple of people i want in my life and am taking it slowly. For everyone else I can not. They would not want to hear from me but i guess they won't let some words kill their life.

backpedalling. I have done a lot of that this year. Thats why this summer I am TRYING to turn that around. I'm taking a break. Funny, I will get hot headed when a friend is going thru drama with another friend. I'm not even involved except as an ear. Its such a trigger it like its happening to me when its not. It really make me pay attention. I'm working on myself and keeping as far away from drama as possible. I believe it will have an affect on me if I cut that type of thinking (or raging) out. Be more an observer.
While I continue my therapy both with a therapist and on my own.

At work i've learned just to stay away negative people ar stupid people. Out in the public i do my best to be nice but i have a bad habit of letting people know what i think if they invade my space or do something stupid around me. i dont like strangers doing crap around me i dont like. And yes theres alot of people i hope i never run into.. I only apologize to the people i feel deserve a apology, the rest will get some more if they havent learned the first time. Thanfully there is meds, makes my tolerance level for people little better.