Impending Break Up Panic

My boyfriend tried to break up with me (for the second time in two months) today.

I can't handle thinking of going through a break up and not having him in my life. I can't stop crying. Last break up I went through was so hard to handle because of all the memories, I ended up in the hospital then eventually moving out of state. I can't do this again.

I know that if we go to counseling together, things will get a lot better. We have an appointment Tuesday. He said he would go.

He kept saying it's not fair, and that he just needs me to be OK.

It's very hard for someone to date an active BPDer. We're volatile people with complicated, hard to understand mood swings and emotional states.
It's probably NOT fair.

I'm glad he'll go to counseling with you, but you should be therapy and getting help JUST FOR YOU if you want things to get better. YOU have to get better. You can't expect him to want to stick around for the roller coaster ride that we tend to be. That's not a good way for a Non to live.
If both of you go to counseling, great... but that won't work every time he reaches a breaking point with you. Sooner or later it's going to be that he's just had enough, and no one can blame him.

So... be sure you're getting help and that you're devoting real effort to making yourself better. It's hard and it's unpleasant, but it's what you need to do if you want to keep him... it will also help in case he has to leave you and you have to deal with a breakup. You won't be as fragile.

Best of luck.

-SmileXx