I'm not just idealizing, am I?

I have never felt so excited and full of love as I do now. ... It's ok for me to feel like this, right? I don't see anything unhealthy about it. I just keep thinking of my soon to be husband and thinking, "I love you I love you I love you I love you" ... haha. He left me a message that just was a heart and then the word "love" over and over again. I exploded from happiness. I just can't wait to be his wife, and we haven't seen each other for 2 months and I'm so excited to see him in a week!

This isn't me just being crazy though... right? It's fine to feel so happy?

Well... a good way of telling, is see if you can find something that annoys you about him, laugh about it, stick your tongue out at him for it, and know how annoying it is. And still love him all that much.

If EVERYTHING about him is good and he is PERFECT, you are idealising. If he is imperfect, but perfect for you, you're just head over heels in love so enjoy it. you can be healthy and feel that way, its just up to you to figure out how much you can do by how far towards healthy you are yet...

With BPD i think its easier to let go & love someone when they are at a little more of a distance, so watch out for that when you see him again don't dive in too far or you'll end up on the whole push-pull thing... so i guess enjoy, but keep perspective too!

all that side of things out of the way, congratulations to both of you!

No - you're not.

Plain and simple.

All that's happening is that you're having an exaggerated emotioal reaction - what's new with BPD huh? But it's a happy one this time.....so long as you are mindful of what's going through your mind then you're doing fine. It's good to keep an eye on extreme emotional reactions of good and bad types because we know not to trust our emotions. But enjoy it while it lasts!

I'm all happy because my new bloke is coming over tomorrow (and not planning on leaving until Friday ).....I get excited like you, but enjoy it. I try not to get overly carried away and I'm not tying myself up with him - I'm keeping my own identity and am taking care to evaluate things and not fall head over heels too soon. But I'm allowing myself to feel happy and cheerful.

Well, geeze, this place isn't supposed to be happy


Good to see it though! Happy for ya's!!!

BPDers certainly don't lack in passion. You gonna rock these guys worlds


PS Mindfulness sucks

Thank you everyone! I still feel so incredibly happy and excited. I can remember all the bad things... all the things he's done that upset me... but I just sorta push them out of my mind and focus on the good. I've done a lot of ugly things to his feelings as well, so we just have to throw all that aside and focus on a new beginning. I lasted 2 months waiting for him. I didn't go seek out someone else to give me affection. I didn't try and entice my ex back, who was living extremely close and I could've at least had sexy fun times with. Nope.. I was a good girl, and I want to start everything off right!!!

I'm starting to wonder if this man and I are an alright match because he has a personality issue of some sort too. He's only really wanted to be with 2 other people besides me, and they both have awful emotional issues... they needed to be taken care of. He has a co-dependent tendency for sure, but he doesn't mind that. What bothers me more is that the psyche in the navy told him that he was egotistical to the point of delusion. I'm not sure what that means... but when you piece things together, he does seem to have that quality. He admits to, in the past, being a master manipulator and extreme liar. He told me that he hasn't lied since meeting and falling for me though, because I was extremely honest with him. Maybe that's a lie in itself! Ha... I don't know... and I don't know if I ever want to. Things now are great... I don't want to mess it up by over-analyzing things.