The 7 Benefits of BPD - A Little Optimism

Warning: This may or may not cause a trigger.

I was diagnosed last week and have been reading furiously about BPD and all I see is negativity and it really gets me down, causes major triggers. It seriously makes me keep labelling myself as sick and of course I am working towards recovery but why does BPD necessarily have to be a bad thing. Yes it causes a lot of destruction in relationships and to ourselves but I would like to make a topic about some of the benefits of BPD so that we can at least have something we can feel good about while recovering:

The 7 Benefits of BPD:
1. PASSIONATE: Extreme intensity of passion when we find something that interests us.
2. INDIVIDUALISTIC: Fight for Individualism, against any conformity.
3. CURIOUS: Curious about anything and everything.
4. INTENSE: Every moment of life is experienced at extreme intensity, experiencing life to the fullest with both the highs and the lows.
5. INSIGHTFUL: Since we have experienced so much pain in our past, we are able to draw on these experiences for the present moment via self-awareness, helping ourselves and others.
6. LEADERS: Due to the splitting nature of relationships and lack of empathy, we make great leaders.
7. CONVICTION: Have an unwavering sense of belief in ourselves, never letting others bring us down.

well its something good to think on the positives!

Leaders - because lack of empathy. . . .


What's the deal with borderline empathy. I seem to have almost none when it comes to people being hurt. Unless it's extreme pain where I become afraid, I feel almost nothing. Cut on finger - so what? Cold hands - deal with it, etc. . . . . I have a lot of empathy when someone is emotionally breaking down. I upsets me a lot when people push other peoples buttons.

There are a lot of examples. They could go on and on where I have it and where I don't. I do think it's a little different.

Does anyone know anything about borderline empathy? Where is it usually lacking, where is it strong? We're not antisocials where we have none. What's the deal?

But what good are they if you don't have anyone to share them with ;(

Very good positives! I agree the most with the PASSION & INTENSITY.

They are things I identify with very much & often see as a positive. I experience emotions that other people can't even imagine.

& concerning Borderline empathy. That's a tough subject for me as well. Usually I'm completely apathetic towards other people's feelings. Completely apathetic. But, when I fell in love with my roommate, I saw her have a breakdown & it completely broke my heart & I felt like I was gonna cry myself.

So, I guess, when I "do" feel empathy, its incredibly strong. All-or-nothing.

Eh... maybe it's just me but I feel really pessimistic about most of those. Lol. What good is passion if it lasts 5 minutes then I stop caring or give up? I'm hardly an individual. My personality is totally dependent on whoever I'm trying to fit in with at that moment, and if I try to be "myself" I give away how self-absorbed I actually am. Insight into my past is too painful. Thinking about it makes me feel weathered and broken forever.

I do agree about intensity of emotions. I have fleeting thoughts about death all the time but I always know I'll get over it quickly.

I think the important thing here is "you are more than just your disorder".

I know its called a "personality disorder" but not everything is disorder. maybe people with certain personality styles are prone to BPD, so BPDs have things in common... but of course not everything about you is "disordered", and lots of the things you've pointed out are all good. ive heard people say there is a difference between "having BPD" and "being borderline", i guess "being borderline" is meant as just being a healthier you. you're more than a disorder! (((hugs)))

i agree with all of those except 6.. which id change slightly - what does help with leadership is a little impulsivity, cause sometimes split-second desicions are needed. sometimes you have to be able to detach yourself and make hard desicions, but when there are hard desicions i think despite empathy is better than without it. im not dxed anything but have found leadership skills improve dramatically as "splitting" and "empathy problems" improve!

but i like that list. and i think a lot of that stuff can be personality stuff too, not just disorder stuff

I have no leadership qualities to speak of. I’m just not comfortable bossing people around. I also don’t think I lack empathy, so much as I just get so absorbed in my own little world that I fail to interact with the real world around me.

About the empathy thing.I'm usually 100% apathetic to most people's suffering,probably more apathetic than the antisocials here,but some people just have the qualities that trigger my empathy and it goes haywire.I have hurt people emotionaly and physically without any remorse,but once we made fun of this kid in school and when it was my turn to make fun of him,I just froze.Now I stay away from that guy.

hehe maybe I was a tiny bit off with the leadership thing. I think we would probably end up scaring everyone away. Passion and intensity kind of go hand in hand. I find I become deeply passionate and committed to something I really enjoy, it does blind sight me but at least I can fully surround myself in it.

I've got a new label for BPD, instead of "borderline", it should be "borderline genius".

Empathy is definitely pretty hard for me too. I can really only empathise with others I can directly relate to, e.g. if they have experience the exact same hardships as me I can feel their pain, etc. It becomes somewhat hard to bridge the gap. I think it is just building these skills gradually and of course it is really dependent on your current mood.

I'm pretty new to BPD but it could be a disconnection in the brain due to the lack of love received during childhood therefore unable to actually experience empathy with others. Could also be due to the narcissus nature, i.e. always thinking about ourselves to really care about what the other person is going through and of course the mood swings really don't help as it is pretty damn painful. I think constant exposure to a supportive environment that has these kind of caring attitudes will develop the brain further in understanding emotion and feeling empathy for others. Also a relatively normal mood would definitely help.