Incapable Of Genuine Emotional Connections To Men

I'm not sure if this goes here but since I'm BPD, (with Sociopathic traits), I wonder if any other Borderlines feel they are incapable of feeling any emotional connection with the opposite sex. The ONLY feelings I get are intense lust and delusional feelings they arise from loving someone I cannot have and don't know. As soon as they return the emotions or even SEEM as if they're opening up emotionally to me, I get repulsed and start distancing myself..and it's MEN only.

I wondered if I was bisexual and homoromantic. I just cannot feel anything for men at all..and I think deep down I'm a misandrist as well.. I see men like objects I guess.. even ones I was so-called obsessed with, it was just SEXUAL obsession, which also came with jealousy. Thinking about "being there" for a man , like rubbing his back and wiping his tears away makes me cringe. I often have friends with benefits with all my guy friends. We share p*rn back & forth & etc.. but some of them start catching feelings and the friendship ends. This is SO frustrating because I dream of being married but no matter what I do, I can NOT feel genuine emotions for men!!!

it could be something simple - and yes, I know it's cheesy, but maybe you haven't met the right person yet. Or maybe you just want to live a bit before settling down.

With BPD it can be complicated. Perhaps you want the unavailable ones because it's easier, it allows you to avoid real intimacy, you don't think you deserve better than that, you're punishing yourself like self-harm. The ones that want nothing serious suit you because you can avoid all the emotional intimacy stuff. Maybe you fear abandonment or engulfment and so a guy you can't have feels kind of safer - you know that will happen. The chase can be exciting. Deep down you feel unloveable or feeling you deserve to be treated badly so that kind of relationship can feel attractive.

We are complicated. I guess you need to work out why you feel like that. You could feel that way for many reasons.

Please correct me if I am wrong but why do you feel the need to gain emotional connection towards men?

It sounds like you can form emotional connections with woman and have sexual attraction to them, so if you want to get married then marry a woman as that seems to fit you well.

I am bisexual and heteroromantic. I've had romantic feelings for woman but the last woman I dated made me realize the emotional connection was not there as it was with men.

Unless I am missing a cultural or informational aspect here, I don't see the need to overanalyze it.

In terms of friends ending because of feelings, happens all the time and I'm sorry but it can be difficult. I had four old friends cut me off due to unrequited feelings in July. I was very sad but it's also hard.

Thanks for your insightful replies. The first one of course makes sense.. Sometimes I feel like I'm a man in a woman's body but I'm not a transgender or don't feel the urge to switch out.

The 2nd response also makes sense and it is something I've thought of myself..marrying a woman.. but honestly I probably shouldnt be in any relationship because I cheat on everybody anyways... even women. It's not out of insecurity or anything like that but rather because of my human nature. Well, anyways thanks

Thinking about "being there" for a man , like rubbing his back and wiping his tears away makes me cringe.

there are other ways to be for a man. u can just stand in the same room and offer support. when i needed help with my tax stuff, my friend helped me out immediately and 'was there' for me.

one doesnt offer support only by wiping tears. at times one can just wipe away the reason for tears. once my friend had to talk to someone to the laundry guy on phone but he was anxious, so he handed me the phone.