Gaslighting

you are tying ot make yourself look better
so is that in fact a lie
trying to distord realety
let's say lipstick
lips are usualy not that red (or another collour)
men dress up
they usualy dont wear that in everyday life

these are all natural proces techneeques
so where the regular stuff ends and abuse begins is a grey zone
mostely subjective
great thing to bitch about and not a lot of ppl will tell them they are wrong

madjoe wrote:you are tying ot make yourself look better
so is that in fact a lie

No, that's not a lie. A lie would be saying, "this is my natural appearance" when they are dressed up. A lie is an intentionally false statement.

Source: http://www.dictionary.com/browse/lie

Also, definition 2 defines it as: something intended or serving to convey a false impression; imposture.

Imposture: http://www.dictionary.com/browse/imposture?s=t

1. the action or practice of imposing fraudulently upon others.
2. deception using an assumed character, identity, or name, as by an impostor.
3. an instance or piece of fraudulent imposition.

That's not gaslighting. Lying and gaslighting are not necessarily synonymous. The intention of gaslighting is to get someone to doubt their perception of reality, whereas the intention of imposture is to create a false image and get someone to believe it. So if a person doesn't doubt another person's false image, then they aren't being gaslighted by the person portraying the false image. They're just being conned.

Purple 8 wrote:So if a person doesn't doubt another person's false image, then they aren't being gaslighted by the person portraying the false image. They're just being conned.

I also want to add to this that if the person portraying the false image doesn't have the intention of getting the other person to doubt the false image, then the other person isn't being gaslighted.

A lie is an intentionally false statement.

is it?
i i can imply a lot
you can lead ppl to draw conclusions etc

madjoe wrote:A lie is an intentionally false statement.

is it?

No, the dictionary is lying. You're absolutely correct.

I see where madjoe is going with this.

A lie doesn't always have to be an outright statement......... "I am a woman."

For instance, if its a man dressed as a woman but a very convincing transgender.....yet he/she doesn't say anything, even when people assume he/she is a woman.

Isn't that a form of lying?

If someone knows someone has gotten the wrong impression, and they let the person believe that, without direct saying it, or without correcting them.....its very, very close to a lie.

Not sure its gaslighting though. Possibly a form of it.

MotherRussia wrote:If someone knows someone has gotten the wrong impression, and they let the person believe that, without direct saying it, or without correcting them.....its very, very close to a lie.

It is a lie, as per definition #2. It's imposture.

Not sure its gaslighting though. Possibly a form of it.

There's only one form of gaslighting, which is a very specific thing. Gaslighting is trying to get someone to doubt their own perception, memory and sanity. That isn't the case in your transgender scenario, because the people around him are only ASSUMING that he is a woman. They haven't witnessed physical evidence that he is and he's not, so he isn't trying to distort and discredit a perception, he's feeding into a perception.

Now, if someone saw his genitalia first hand and he denied that what they saw was real with the intention of getting them to doubt themselves, then that would be gaslighting.

In seduction, there is generally some game, people try to look good.

In my mind, there can be, in some cases, gaslighting in seduction.

For instance, playing all the game, stares, clothes, sentences, gestures etc. Then when the person approaches saying WHAT? What are you imagining?

Or playing the commitment game "I want to find a partner for life", "which name do you like for children?" then when the partner wants to commit : "WHAT? What are you imagining?"

For me, that's a form of gaslighting. Although it's not explicit lie. There is implicit way to relate, that is denied later.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXjXB0RVLHE

Purple 8 wrote:
Now, if someone saw his genitalia first hand and he denied that what they saw was real with the intention of getting them to doubt themselves, then that would be gaslighting.

You are very right.

Philonoe wrote:In seduction, there is generally some game, people try to look good.

In my mind, there can be, in some cases, gaslighting in seduction.

For instance, playing all the game, stares, clothes, sentences, gestures etc. Then when the person approaches saying WHAT? What are you imagining?

Or playing the commitment game "I want to find a partner for life", "which name do you like for children?" then when the partner wants to commit : "WHAT? What are you imagining?"

For me, that's a form of gaslighting. Although it's not explicit lie. There is implicit way to relate, that is denied later.

I think this is an excellent illustration of gaslighting and how it can occur in seduction. I think this is very common, also.

Sometimes it can be "unintentional;" a person can just change their mind, get cold feet, etc. But just as often it can be intentional with some devious plan behind it.

madjoe wrote:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXjXB0RVLHE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEsqGOHo0nI